WEEK SEVEN CONTENDERS: FRANK (2-0) vs NYCSPITZ (2-0) NYC WINS 3-2

Adverse · 05-22-2022, 01:52 PM

I agree with Objective this is probably the best battle we’ve seen this season, on paper it looked like it would be an absolute slobber knocker and what do you know it held true to that

NYC
Repetition in a topical isn’t something I’m entirely fond of when it comes to driving the point home but I think it worked here because it felt almost like you were writing theme music for the deranged octopus bitch, like this entire thing read like a theme song from one of those 80s-90s superhero cartoons and I loved every second of it. Excellent incorporation of humor here I could tell you were having fun with it. Loved the order you told this in too like, showed what your heroine did, then told the origin and then told about what became of her. Was really dope and I enjoyed it

Frank
I’m a big fan of pirate lore and just oceanic stuff in general so this was right up my alley. I liked the way this was told like an old wives tale or something you could almost hear a whistling pirate tune in the background. My only complaint with it is maybe it was a little bit overstuffed? You brought up everything at once like the pirates, the lore, their wives , you painted a lot of dope pictures but I just thought the progression was a little discombobulated because you had so much going on. I guess that’s my only complaint and I thought the ending could have been stronger? My opinion though

MVGT NYCSPITZ

He told a really good narrative that didn’t feel too overstuffed, story progression was better you know? So I’m leaning that way

05-22-2022, 01:52 PM	#8
Adverse low tide in serotonin bay Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 2,752 Battle Record: 37-28 Champed - GWL Picture Challenge - Guerrilla Writing League - Black August II Rep Power: 15446146	I agree with Objective this is probably the best battle we’ve seen this season, on paper it looked like it would be an absolute slobber knocker and what do you know it held true to that NYC Repetition in a topical isn’t something I’m entirely fond of when it comes to driving the point home but I think it worked here because it felt almost like you were writing theme music for the deranged octopus bitch, like this entire thing read like a theme song from one of those 80s-90s superhero cartoons and I loved every second of it. Excellent incorporation of humor here I could tell you were having fun with it. Loved the order you told this in too like, showed what your heroine did, then told the origin and then told about what became of her. Was really dope and I enjoyed it Frank I’m a big fan of pirate lore and just oceanic stuff in general so this was right up my alley. I liked the way this was told like an old wives tale or something you could almost hear a whistling pirate tune in the background. My only complaint with it is maybe it was a little bit overstuffed? You brought up everything at once like the pirates, the lore, their wives , you painted a lot of dope pictures but I just thought the progression was a little discombobulated because you had so much going on. I guess that’s my only complaint and I thought the ending could have been stronger? My opinion though MVGT NYCSPITZ He told a really good narrative that didn’t feel too overstuffed, story progression was better you know? So I’m leaning that way