02-14-2020, 06:46 AM | #1 |
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,795
Battle Record: 17-32
Rep Power: 52474189 |
State of Emergency
Father of tone's raising voices,
a pearl in the rough among auto-tune oysters. Imbed this gen, poke a man with corpses, Ash is dead, fuck these faceless droids with dreads if robo fashion spreads. Baseless noise diagnosed with annoying voice but no tourettes, who cares what you say, or who's next to US army's vets? Tell me to mark it 0 and I mark it red, get sued to play or sample getting scarred instead. Tattoo artists carving scriptures with henna mixtures, go on tour to kill Enna listeners, fuck your taste and pictures. Guess I'm gettin old with age, sold to fade and countin days while I devour hours with bitter, sours, drinkin liquor with gs and cowards. These keys are ours, rich in style with easel powers to give these streets a hard on, big ups to boomers hatin weasel stardom. Vikings with plastic helmets has their asses hellbent on fantasized violence to help em pass and sell it. Bottled trends with shifting friends' ain't lasting plans, just ask and laugh cus task at hand is masking brands. Just change your stance, make it great and part the strands, say it stands for something like your honest rotting concepts that'll crumble under pressure like modern artisans plotting projects. Televised culture for cash grab vultures is scary potent, but there's nothing on yet. Shit, who needs some eerie content?
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I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave,
So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o |
02-14-2020, 12:25 PM | #2 |
............
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,938
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Firstly, thanks for the feed on my joint with Cereal...Secondly it's hard to critique a piece when everyone thinks I'm shit lol.
I thought your first bar was nice... "Baseless noise diagnosed with annoying voice but no tourettes," ^^As was that... The rest is solid so props, liked the imagery & meta's but yeah sometimes I think your word usage threw me off & seriously took me away from what was quite a well flowin' piece...That probably made no sense fam. It was good, just wanted cleaner (not more complex) vocab bro...Stay upwards. |
02-14-2020, 10:12 PM | #3 |
Steadily Lurking
Join Date: Jul 2013
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Bro...bro...what an objective brother! Digging ur formula..props on the recipe...keep cooking.
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https://www.instagram.com/master_rock1/ https://www.youtube.com/graphicalmindz |
02-15-2020, 12:50 AM | #4 | ||
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,795
Battle Record: 17-32
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Quote:
Plus, it's always easier to read shit from an outside perspective too, see mistakes and where stuff can be improved. When I first got involved with topicals etc. here I got destroyed but I put time and effort into my votes, I think I even made a verse at one point as my vote explaining it all, lol. People enjoyed my votes, got props and rep for them despite me being way worse. Outside perspective can open eyes, you may see something others don't etc. Quote:
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I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave,
So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o |
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02-15-2020, 01:33 AM | #5 |
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 3,938
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Your so welcome fam, I think your pieces are nice...Was just bein' honest @ fa real didn't mean to be disrespectful in any way...I'll always feed joints from you.
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02-15-2020, 10:36 PM | #6 |
low tide in serotonin bay
Join Date: Jul 2013
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I love your vocabulary first and foremost, you keep my mind on its toes, whereas I expect you to say one thing and you completely uppercut me with a different word. It’s dope and I like the way your piece started off, I read it as almost slam poetry, like there was a lot of emphasis on the ending of bars. I also enjoyed how it was super chaotic but still felt grounded thematically. Dope work sir
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02-19-2020, 10:11 AM | #7 |
Everything's Connected
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Sick. This forum needs some eerie content for sure. ANY content actually lol. Keep it coming.
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..Passed the Present and Future.. |
02-22-2020, 08:21 PM | #8 |
Twitter: @ricanjq
Join Date: May 2016
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just ask and laugh cus task at hand is masking brands.
Just change your stance, make it great and part the strands, say it stands for something like your honest rotting concepts that'll crumble under pressure like modern artisans plotting project |
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