Make. Believe.

YDK · 01-30-2014, 01:49 AM

Lol this was tight dude, flow was solid but had a lime or two that seemed a couple syllables too many. The story an imagery were dope as fuvk tho, the whole following in your father footsteps an assuming both getting taken in for the same reason. The nice twist of it being by your highschool Bunny was cool too. Honestly wish it would have had another stanza explaining life in jail as a cop would have been a more complete ending but that could be a whole another verse altogether tho.
All in all a dope piece bruh keep it up

01-30-2014, 01:49 AM	#3
YDK ghost in the matrix Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Covington, KY Posts: 4,563 Battle Record: 14-25 Champed - Art of Writing League (x2) - Lime Green Poetry Association Rep Power: 8181113	Lol this was tight dude, flow was solid but had a lime or two that seemed a couple syllables too many. The story an imagery were dope as fuvk tho, the whole following in your father footsteps an assuming both getting taken in for the same reason. The nice twist of it being by your highschool Bunny was cool too. Honestly wish it would have had another stanza explaining life in jail as a cop would have been a more complete ending but that could be a whole another verse altogether tho. All in all a dope piece bruh keep it up __________________