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10-17-2013, 02:31 AM
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#1 |
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V.V
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: .
Posts: 2,076
Battle Record: 31-20
Rep Power: 6247259   |
Clash of the Lycans
I bet you'd suck ejected dog balls through glory holes in your mom's walls.
YOU ARE ANUS!!! If memory serves, they already made a planet where you should fuck off. You pretentious, feaux-religious, ghetto indigenous PRICK!! Nobody cares about your metro-ridiculous flare, despite the fact you're never mentioning dicks. Moniker to give off that mysterious vibe, like, "Who's that lil pimp in disguise?" Only to find out the midget on the over-sized keyboard was a remote-con TROLLER just living a lie! You're an alt... everyone knows it... yet they ignore, tend to your bore, and blow stick. Well I'll set you straight, fag... your wife is a whore, yet Home Sweet Home's on your door and you've never been closer to your right hand and that lotion!! I swear dude... let you grow a fan base on Cees... they'll all get aired too! And since we were on the subject of BALLS... I could tear them all in pairs too! You're a queer noob with a keg tummy and beer boobs. Bet your instagram suggests you're fly... but with the homies your girl's legs get more air time than leers do! You ol', 'my avi looks serious, but i'm bi-curious' lookin ass nigga!!! No matter how many small Asians you fuck, their moans'll never suggest your getting bigger!! Fall off and get lost loser, I'm a bruiser... you'll never compete with me. You a Yung Berg and J-Kwon, I'm lyrically Shifty to your 50. You'd actually hafta lyrically 'get me' just ta get me... So, again, tell me- who the fuck comes luke warm at Wayne Gretsky?!?! Your rhymes are way thin, and I am Jason... red knife and mask after I erase men... And you the Green Ranger??... come and attend your leviathan's annihilation!! Don't write pretend... u stay on that play shit... On vicodin I'm more coherent in my displays, bitch! Probably once had an empire, but now you're in mom's basement... So when you rebuild those forts with trash, its obvious- in your past life you were hatian... VividlyVague can suck a dick. I fuckin hate him.
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10-17-2013, 06:38 AM
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Keeper Of The Fresh
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Mayhem Gardens
Posts: 84
Rep Power: 36 |
This was kinda all over the place. a few clever lines here and there. some sharp ideas that could've been worded better. the flow could be a bit tighter in places. i guess you were going for comedic value with this self diss? it was a cool read none the less. something different from the usual. which i can appreciate.
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10-17-2013, 01:15 PM
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#3 |
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V.V
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: .
Posts: 2,076
Battle Record: 31-20
Rep Power: 6247259 |
much appreciated
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10-17-2013, 03:25 PM
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Mic Check
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Calgary Alberta Canada
Posts: 708
Battle Record: 13-10
Rep Power: 3742225  |
hahaha wtf. well yeah u surprised me with the ending lol. i def gotta give u props for originality.. and emotion.. haha u came at urself pretty hard, lol sounds gay. i agree with Leg, it was def all over the place and not smooth but that clearly was not the point here which was comedy etc.. it was different and something fresh to read, and a bit funny, and i was wondering who u were dissing right till the end so u tricked me there. check out my shit called another squalor i think u'll like.. its kindof along these lines as far as just dumb funny shit
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My syllable count approximately a billion, bounce. You cannot compete. |
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10-17-2013, 03:38 PM
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Mic Check
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Calgary Alberta Canada
Posts: 708
Battle Record: 13-10
Rep Power: 3742225 |
whoops im an idiot.. yeah i even remember ur feed, my bad, lol!! check out taste the rainbow then??? ahahaha
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My syllable count approximately a billion, bounce. You cannot compete. |
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10-17-2013, 03:49 PM
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#7 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,230
Rep Power: 5303583 |
i dont use this word often
but this occasion seems fitting this was crap lmfao aint even worth insulting past that btw i only read the first bit #1 |
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10-17-2013, 05:39 PM
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#8 | |
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V.V
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: .
Posts: 2,076
Battle Record: 31-20
Rep Power: 6247259 |
Quote:
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10-17-2013, 07:36 PM
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#9 |
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The Clown Prince
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,046
Battle Record: 35-45
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 59349682 |
This was interesting, I really like the title first and foremost
either way this was an all over the place sort of piece I see you really exercising your writing process though you seem like the only one to go back and forth with me in the Cypher and I thank you for that, this piece had a few dope lines I feel like if you broke it up a bit and made the structure easy on the eyes it would get a few feathers riled up...even your own...nice drop
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.....laugh....and the world laughs with you |
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10-18-2013, 04:30 PM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 408
Battle Record: 6-2
Accomplishments - Open Mic HOF
Rep Power: 20182439 |
I thought I commented on this. I liked the tenacity.
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10-18-2013, 05:11 PM
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#11 |
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V.V
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: .
Posts: 2,076
Battle Record: 31-20
Rep Power: 6247259 |
Thanks! stuff like this is good vent therapy lol.
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10-18-2013, 06:42 PM
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#12 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1,709
Battle Record: 9-12
Rep Power: 4997617 |
that opening line tho, ROFL!!!
wasn't really going in any direction but for a flex piece i dug it. funny as fuck tho. keep at it bro. peace
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| lmaoatthatsecondtag, vividlygayasfuck, vividlyvague |
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