WEEK NINE: TIMELESS (2-3) vs MASTER ROCK (4-4) TIMELESS WINS 3-0

Adverse · 06-08-2022, 12:02 AM

Tried voting on this yesterday but dozed off lol

Basically it went like this

Timeless -
I think you knew what you were going to write before you even seen the topic this week, you kind of shoehorned yourself into the same story again by throwing a “to be continued” at the end of the verse last week, it’s all good, continuity is cool and outside of Universe I haven’t seen many people ambitious enough to approach a topic spanning over several weeks. That being said I think your connection to the picture this week could have been a lot tighter than a cheap flashback scene for your character, especially since you got the luck of both of your topics having to do with space, seems like they’d be more cohesive, and would have gone hand in hand, I don’t know this week just felt less inspired than the verse that beat me last week. Also didn’t like this meta line

“ Last week I wrote a verse about a true experience in my life.
At the end I wrote, "To be continued..." so I'm here to write.”

Just took a lot of wind out of the story for me. Felt cheap.

Master Rock:
Appreciate you brotha you’re an asset to this league and I’m glad you manage to show weekly despite being busy, but this was the same song and dance on your part. A half hearted verse that showed some potential here and there and made me only wish it was longer and more fleshed out. I can’t with good conscience ever vote for something like that, so with all due respect

Vote - Timeless even though this wasn’t his best he still did enough to out write his opponent.

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06-08-2022, 12:02 AM	#6
Adverse low tide in serotonin bay Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 2,752 Battle Record: 37-28 Champed - GWL Picture Challenge - Guerrilla Writing League - Black August II Rep Power: 15446146	Tried voting on this yesterday but dozed off lol Basically it went like this Timeless - I think you knew what you were going to write before you even seen the topic this week, you kind of shoehorned yourself into the same story again by throwing a “to be continued” at the end of the verse last week, it’s all good, continuity is cool and outside of Universe I haven’t seen many people ambitious enough to approach a topic spanning over several weeks. That being said I think your connection to the picture this week could have been a lot tighter than a cheap flashback scene for your character, especially since you got the luck of both of your topics having to do with space, seems like they’d be more cohesive, and would have gone hand in hand, I don’t know this week just felt less inspired than the verse that beat me last week. Also didn’t like this meta line “ Last week I wrote a verse about a true experience in my life. At the end I wrote, "To be continued..." so I'm here to write.” Just took a lot of wind out of the story for me. Felt cheap. Master Rock: Appreciate you brotha you’re an asset to this league and I’m glad you manage to show weekly despite being busy, but this was the same song and dance on your part. A half hearted verse that showed some potential here and there and made me only wish it was longer and more fleshed out. I can’t with good conscience ever vote for something like that, so with all due respect Vote - Timeless even though this wasn’t his best he still did enough to out write his opponent.