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Old 08-23-2018, 06:25 AM   #1
Chill Phil
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Default Couples Halloween Costume Crisis...

So...the old lady has been pitching a bunch of shitty ideas for Halloween. She's white as fuck, and I'm black. She doesn't seem to understand that we can't be the Flintstones.

She eats a lot of sweets and candy and shit late at night, and complains that she's gaining weight.

I've been holding back pitching the idea of being Kermit and Miss Piggy...because it'll offend the fuck out of her. I need your help brainstorming ideas on how to present that idea to her without having to deal with her thinking I'm attacking her insecurities.

Even though I came up with the idea while absolutely passively aggressively insulting her late night candy consumption.

Help me lie Bros ..
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:04 AM   #2
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Fuxking dead @kermit and miss piggy. Lmmfaooooooo
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:06 AM   #3
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Salt and pepper?
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:11 AM   #4
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There are T shirts that just say 'Netflix' and 'Chill'.

I wouldn't outright suggest Piggy/Kermit as a couples outfit unless you're ready to see how petty she can be to get even with you. but if you're Gonna suggest it anyway I would suggest it as "Let's go as muppets(or memes)" Followed by - "I'll be Kermit" (see if she comes up with the idea on her own)
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:28 AM   #5
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Salt and pepper?
LMAO, great idea
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:40 AM   #6
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Be a man with balls, bro. If she get's offended then so be it. At least you're being real & honest. She should appreciate you... If her weight gain doesn't bother you - then why should it matter?
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Old 08-23-2018, 08:01 AM   #7
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Seems like u want her to realize she’s fat.

Why not reverse it and suggest really tight outfits for her.

If she don’t get the hint then u in trouble
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Old 08-23-2018, 08:22 AM   #8
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This is a troll thread right?
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Old 08-23-2018, 08:56 AM   #9
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blade and kris kristofferson obv
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Old 08-23-2018, 09:06 AM   #10
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Lol Halloween isn't really a thing here...like it is back home, unfortunately.
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Old 08-23-2018, 03:46 PM   #11
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Be a man with balls, bro. If she get's offended then so be it. At least you're being real & honest. She should appreciate you... If her weight gain doesn't bother you - then why should it matter?
Being a man is taking time to think instead of doing and saying things that could potentially hurt people close to you. There's no intelligence involved with being crass or untactful.

Women don't appreciate the truth. They appreciate sensitivity.
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Old 08-23-2018, 03:47 PM   #12
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Seems like u want her to realize she’s fat.

Why not reverse it and suggest really tight outfits for her.

If she don’t get the hint then u in trouble
Lol, she's not fat! Maybe in 3 years or so...

I'll figure it out on my own I guess.

Thanks for nothing NCGs
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Old 08-23-2018, 04:16 PM   #13
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Ficking amen.

Amens wife: babe how does this look on me?

Amen: looks awful, you look fat.

Amens wife: thanks babe, your so awesome
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Old 08-23-2018, 04:17 PM   #14
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Old lady has been pitching a bunch of shitty ideas for Halloween, I guess I'm gonna suggest the most cliche couples costume that ever existed
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Old 08-23-2018, 06:34 PM   #15
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Quote:
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Ficking amen.

Amens wife: babe how does this look on me?

Amen: looks awful, you look fat.

Amens wife: thanks babe, your so awesome
That’s accurate. Then she hits the gym.
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Old 08-23-2018, 06:54 PM   #16
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*jim
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:18 PM   #17
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*jim
Maybe your wife hits the Jim and main course.
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:29 PM   #18
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Ha!
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Old 08-23-2018, 07:30 PM   #19
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Lol
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Old 08-23-2018, 11:43 PM   #20
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Al and Peg Bundy
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