New track: "Booooom" audio

Vulgar · 08-23-2013, 08:15 PM

W

PancakeBrah · 08-23-2013, 08:20 PM

The fact I looked at the lyrics before the track started is indicative of something.

You read written lyrics like Aesop Rock. If you didn't read this in delivery, you deliver like Aesop Rock. Strong lyricism, but a running on until a firefly moment of perfect delivery arrives to match them, but I'm too busy trying to catch it and inhale it that I miss the next moment, subsequently missing the next couple of lines of run on. You're already on to the next busy point to make. Your writing reads so meaningful and articulate and weighted in text, but you fail to capture that in audio. Give yourself the time you deserve.

Vulgar · 08-23-2013, 08:23 PM

You're right, I need a rap coach. Thanks for ze feed.

PancakeBrah · 08-23-2013, 08:24 PM

w/e, just trying to give critique to help bruv

08-23-2013, 08:15 PM	#1
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	New track: "Booooom" audio W Last edited by Vulgar; 12-03-2021 at 09:43 PM.

08-23-2013, 08:20 PM	#2
PancakeBrah SOBER Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 12,480 Battle Record: 2-5 Champed - AOWL Season 2 Rep Power: 85899407	The fact I looked at the lyrics before the track started is indicative of something. You read written lyrics like Aesop Rock. If you didn't read this in delivery, you deliver like Aesop Rock. Strong lyricism, but a running on until a firefly moment of perfect delivery arrives to match them, but I'm too busy trying to catch it and inhale it that I miss the next moment, subsequently missing the next couple of lines of run on. You're already on to the next busy point to make. Your writing reads so meaningful and articulate and weighted in text, but you fail to capture that in audio. Give yourself the time you deserve. __________________ Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder

08-23-2013, 08:24 PM	#4
PancakeBrah SOBER Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 12,480 Battle Record: 2-5 Champed - AOWL Season 2 Rep Power: 85899407	w/e, just trying to give critique to help bruv __________________ Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder

08-23-2013, 08:23 PM	#3
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	You're right, I need a rap coach. Thanks for ze feed.