A Deadman's Spitz- SCAR'S RECLUSE

PancakeBrah · 07-12-2013, 03:48 PM

Great piece.

Posting from my phone so quotes aren't possible. By NYC I liked your opener; when you went with the same scheme for a third and eventual fourth line I thought it would be a bit bland but the way you worded the fourth line (matrix resists) plus the quasi multi agent Smith's was nice. Didn't like the center stool line. Felt really generic, like color by numbers braggadacio. The following line, though, was my favorite from your verse. Also liked the wretches I've fed line and thought the 'owls and techs' scheme was the standout.

Black killed it. Gets old saying. Drop a shit verse sometime. Just to keep people on their toes. Illusory notes/beautiful quotes/viewing the post triplet was the MVP of the piece. GG Allin! Fun reference for the tikes. Super lucid, bro.

What a swell collabo

07-12-2013, 03:48 PM	#6
PancakeBrah SOBER Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 12,480 Battle Record: 2-5 Champed - AOWL Season 2 Rep Power: 85899407	Great piece. Posting from my phone so quotes aren't possible. By NYC I liked your opener; when you went with the same scheme for a third and eventual fourth line I thought it would be a bit bland but the way you worded the fourth line (matrix resists) plus the quasi multi agent Smith's was nice. Didn't like the center stool line. Felt really generic, like color by numbers braggadacio. The following line, though, was my favorite from your verse. Also liked the wretches I've fed line and thought the 'owls and techs' scheme was the standout. Black killed it. Gets old saying. Drop a shit verse sometime. Just to keep people on their toes. Illusory notes/beautiful quotes/viewing the post triplet was the MVP of the piece. GG Allin! Fun reference for the tikes. Super lucid, bro. What a swell collabo