WEEK THREE: ADONIS (1-1) vs SINACOG (0-1) ADONIS WINS 4-0

Adverse · 04-11-2022, 02:51 AM

Honestly, I feel like Sin’s style isn’t even all that bad. But almost all the the time it’s never on topic, forced multis for the sake of rhyming, and then once a verse has to mention something outlandish like the whole killer whale bit. I don’t know it’s all been said, all been done as far as critique goes. Sinacog at this point is NC’s bearded lady, it all sounds good on paper but then you show up and see it and it’s just kind of sad..think I’ve outgrown the facade you’re putting on here personally

Adonis
Could tell your heart wasn’t in this one. Why would it have to be? Pretty sure you could have copied and pasted a dyson manual with more soul than whatever Sinacog dropped. I like how you found a deeper meaning in the topic though. For many topics what you chose to write about might have been the safe route but feels a little out of the blue on this one. Think it’s a relevant piece about the world we live in and the pressure young women are under especially on social media to put on this big show and be loved. Liked the descriptive language in the first few bars too. Really set up the piece well with the imagery. Good work

Well wasn’t Adonis’s best effort but he easily takes it. As he should have.

V/ Adonis

04-11-2022, 02:51 AM	#5
Adverse low tide in serotonin bay Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 2,752 Battle Record: 37-28 Champed - GWL Picture Challenge - Guerrilla Writing League - Black August II Rep Power: 15446146	Honestly, I feel like Sin’s style isn’t even all that bad. But almost all the the time it’s never on topic, forced multis for the sake of rhyming, and then once a verse has to mention something outlandish like the whole killer whale bit. I don’t know it’s all been said, all been done as far as critique goes. Sinacog at this point is NC’s bearded lady, it all sounds good on paper but then you show up and see it and it’s just kind of sad..think I’ve outgrown the facade you’re putting on here personally Adonis Could tell your heart wasn’t in this one. Why would it have to be? Pretty sure you could have copied and pasted a dyson manual with more soul than whatever Sinacog dropped. I like how you found a deeper meaning in the topic though. For many topics what you chose to write about might have been the safe route but feels a little out of the blue on this one. Think it’s a relevant piece about the world we live in and the pressure young women are under especially on social media to put on this big show and be loved. Liked the descriptive language in the first few bars too. Really set up the piece well with the imagery. Good work Well wasn’t Adonis’s best effort but he easily takes it. As he should have. V/ Adonis