WEEK TWO: BODEY (0-0) vs MASTER ROCK (0-1) MASTER ROCK WINS VIA NS

[Dominate]

I think you did a really good job capturing the essence of the picture. You convey emotion quite well, which isn't as easy to do as you make it look. That's really a strong point for you, based on exactly two verses of yours I've read. Some really good similes/turns of phrase like "trying to collect the shattered pieces together like paper machete barely holding on together". You use your vocabulary well - your choice of words doesn't feel unnatural. I feel like you have the potential to become a top notch writer. One of the main things holding you back in this medium is mechanics. You're definitely right to prioritise content and wording over rhymes and flow, but maybe you could slowly work towards sharpening up your rhythm (consider trying to keep your line lengths more consistent) and using more than one word/syllable rhymes more frequently. Good work MR. Look forward to reading more from you.