WEEK 9 CHAMP MATCH: Clutbuck vs Bodey BODEY FORFEITS, OPEN FOR FEED

Johnny 6 feet · 05-29-2020, 09:33 PM

Feed it is. Damn man. Nothing like being on the receiving end of a woman at that time of the month. Your use of wordplay really stood out in this one. Such as:

Using the new bath bombs could result in fireworks

You’ll lose your voice tryna prove a point; and never get it across with your head bitten off.

You’re cast in a full-blown Period Drama so don’t act off script
If there’s a thin line between love and hate, it’s a tampon string.

If you’re at odds, don’t get even.
She’ll roll over leaving you the cold shoulder treatment, even though she’s heated.

Hilarious shit motivated by real pain. Guess that's the curse of comedy. You brought strong vocab and mixed it in with the rhyme scheme that flowed well but wasn't encumbered by too many compound rhymes. Great use of metaphors sprinkled throughout as well. The sign off was as appropriate as it could get. A couple of overstretched lines here and there but that was a minor niggle in what was overall a great drop. It's a shame this went to a no show, but in any case, congrats champ!

05-29-2020, 09:33 PM	#1
Johnny 6 feet Storyteller Join Date: May 2020 Posts: 446 Battle Record: 8-4 Champed - Guerrilla Writing League Rep Power: 5558447	Feed it is. Damn man. Nothing like being on the receiving end of a woman at that time of the month. Your use of wordplay really stood out in this one. Such as: Using the new bath bombs could result in fireworks You’ll lose your voice tryna prove a point; and never get it across with your head bitten off. You’re cast in a full-blown Period Drama so don’t act off script If there’s a thin line between love and hate, it’s a tampon string. If you’re at odds, don’t get even. She’ll roll over leaving you the cold shoulder treatment, even though she’s heated. Hilarious shit motivated by real pain. Guess that's the curse of comedy. You brought strong vocab and mixed it in with the rhyme scheme that flowed well but wasn't encumbered by too many compound rhymes. Great use of metaphors sprinkled throughout as well. The sign off was as appropriate as it could get. A couple of overstretched lines here and there but that was a minor niggle in what was overall a great drop. It's a shame this went to a no show, but in any case, congrats champ!