Week IV: ACTIVATE SELF vs Objective[OBJECTIVE WINS]

Mr. J · 01-09-2018, 07:45 PM

I was going to stop after pick apart the conscious & vain because that just seemed so oddly put to me.
but the following line shows me how you are going to ride this one out & it made me think it was pretty dope. I enjoyed it.
about half way through that mid section I was getting into the whole piece & thought you did well, really enjoyed that Pearl Harbor section though.
for the most part this seems off kilter for what you usually do and the way you bounce around makes it kind of hard to digest.
regardless you penned an enjoyable drop that made the read easy on the eyes. hopefully you keep it up until next week.
nice drop

01-09-2018, 07:45 PM	#14
Mr. J The Clown Prince Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 5,046 Battle Record: 35-45 Champed - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 59349682	I was going to stop after pick apart the conscious & vain because that just seemed so oddly put to me. but the following line shows me how you are going to ride this one out & it made me think it was pretty dope. I enjoyed it. about half way through that mid section I was getting into the whole piece & thought you did well, really enjoyed that Pearl Harbor section though. for the most part this seems off kilter for what you usually do and the way you bounce around makes it kind of hard to digest. regardless you penned an enjoyable drop that made the read easy on the eyes. hopefully you keep it up until next week. nice drop __________________ .....laugh....and the world laughs with you