( Geno & Mr. J ) -When A Man Loves A Woman

Natural · 05-23-2013, 04:04 AM

I thought this was a good piece as a whole. 6.5 as a whole. I'm kinda picky with my standards so thats a pretty damn good score.
J did far better than i was expecting(no hate intended). I wasn't a fan of the structure but everything else was on point.

Fav part by j was
Are you..at my doorway knockin', portrayin' loss and... pain maybe? what would you really gain baby... what's at the top end...what's wrong with the bottom? maybe my aim is...maybe my aim is aimless..problem? didn't think so, often I dream of bliss..of being monogamus

Geno.
I do still think its not a stray out of your normal style but i can't deny its quality writing.
My fav part is
Neverstandsfor anything until she puts a foot through ur heart
^ that line dope &

The kind of lust I could never resist, wide hips, beautiful shape I thought I found true love, if I only knew it was fake Ruined my faith, now I stare at the moon -alone, truelly amazed Because I have it sketched next to your name, a tattoo, its a shame My shoulder plateglows with hate, I've got to erase u from my flesh Everytime I fucking see it, it reminds me of stupid regrets Bitch.
^ dope

05-23-2013, 04:04 AM	#4
Natural Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 659 Rep Power: 0	I thought this was a good piece as a whole. 6.5 as a whole. I'm kinda picky with my standards so thats a pretty damn good score. J did far better than i was expecting(no hate intended). I wasn't a fan of the structure but everything else was on point. Fav part by j was Are you..at my doorway knockin', portrayin' loss and... pain maybe? what would you really gain baby... what's at the top end...what's wrong with the bottom? maybe my aim is...maybe my aim is aimless..problem? didn't think so, often I dream of bliss..of being monogamus Geno. I do still think its not a stray out of your normal style but i can't deny its quality writing. My fav part is Neverstandsfor anything until she puts a foot through ur heart ^ that line dope & The kind of lust I could never resist, wide hips, beautiful shape I thought I found true love, if I only knew it was fake Ruined my faith, now I stare at the moon -alone, truelly amazed Because I have it sketched next to your name, a tattoo, its a shame My shoulder plateglows with hate, I've got to erase u from my flesh Everytime I fucking see it, it reminds me of stupid regrets Bitch. ^ dope