AOWL WK12: TYSON (4-3) VS. Objective (3-4) [OBJECTIVE WINS, 5-0.]

ThisisDAM · 05-20-2013, 12:50 PM

I have to cut it short fellas, my bad. My lunch is over, haha BUT

Objective has improved time & again since I first saw him. One drawback he's always had I thought was the long lines & syllable counts. But, he always makes up for it in storytelling & imagery especially. This was a great verse. Tyson, I felt you were missing something here. Overall, it's not a bad take or showing, but I didn't feel it was complete. Also, some lines were way too long, such as the ending bars. Good battle tho

Vote - Objective

05-20-2013, 12:50 PM	#1
ThisisDAM Significance over Purpose Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: nYc Posts: 141 Battle Record: 3-2 Rep Power: 38	I have to cut it short fellas, my bad. My lunch is over, haha BUT Objective has improved time & again since I first saw him. One drawback he's always had I thought was the long lines & syllable counts. But, he always makes up for it in storytelling & imagery especially. This was a great verse. Tyson, I felt you were missing something here. Overall, it's not a bad take or showing, but I didn't feel it was complete. Also, some lines were way too long, such as the ending bars. Good battle tho Vote - Objective __________________ Twitter - @ThisisDAM