RD 1: UnbornBuddha vs Vulgar - VULGAR WINS!

[big baby]

Given that the Nazis hated Jews, why would they want to purchase a propagandist brain?

And overall, it wasn't ham-handed or overly-political. It was fun to read

COME ON FAM

Vulgar definitely has the VOTW here. This is just a crazy, fantastical take on the topic. What's so good about it too, is that, he didnt really use anything like a conveyor belt, or a factory setting. He literally scoped the image for what it was. Propaganda. Wrote a verse about propaganda, and that's it. I almost forgot about the image, scrolled up and just said 'very good'. The contrast between actual relics from different eras is another layer he peeled back for the audience to glare at. Again, this is very very obvious fiction, but it's a good story. A lot of things that are fiction are crazy and can create emotion. Doesn't mean the reality of the situation or writing is any less important, or good. This reminds me of a parallel fictional program, The Man In The High Castle. It's indeed fiction, that's the point, where the writers captivate is in the story and how it captures the audience in emotion, detail, etc - basically everything that makes something good. I think to compare the fantasy/reality of it is weird cause it's very obvious the whole point of the entire verse. AMAZYKLON was good, almost read like a stock market listing. It just has so many layers, and similar to Pinots verse, had humor but displayed another level beyond that. The factual metaphors, the keywords of what actually was, but again, with a childish, serious acceptance of the entire consumer/propaganda aspect. I feel this was masterfully done because of the lack of actual time spent into it. I think this was the first verse up - it just writes itself. All you had to do was add your spin, your signature and polish it and you there you have it. Adding all the extra stuff was just an extra spin to an already entrenched tye-dye.


Unborn

The thing I quickly noticed here is that, you started off with Max, as a character. The character. This is similar to what Pinot did with Joey, but it's actually just abandoned all the mechanics of his storyline and you added your own spin to to it. Unborn style. The thing here is that, something I didnt tell Pinot, is that I HATE when stories start off with, hey I'm Johnny blah blah, and heres my thingy thing. It's just so overdone at this point (anagram for point is pinot, btw) I actually almost eyeroll when it happens.

Trying his best to look alive.
Distilled rye in the morning to soothe his mind.
Smiling during the day time, but into the night
He’ll lock himself in the bathroom and unwind
Turning on the faucet before screaming in anguish.
Starting at 9pm sharp began an evening of madness
Searing head stabs radiating to his trigeminal nerve

what set me off here is, that, usually this isnt your style. I think. Or for the most part, when you read writing like this you say "this was funny" when I think, it wasnt funny at all. So I'm not sure, if you think this is funny, this is your humor, or what you're going for. Granted, I already know the writer so these are questions I had to bare in mind.

He lay there prone. Experiencing a major depressive episode,
Quickly losing every sense of control - man thinks he holds.

After the fourth or fifth consecutive Verapamil dose
He reached his threshold. His breaking point.
In his despair he began to hear this faceless voice:
Who told him to log into his laptop and explore.
Aching from his joints he managed to log on and absorb
The details that will lead him down the rabbit hole.
And on that night the greatest hacker was born
Because a little unknown voice hacked his soul.

The first thing that came to mind is, that usually a word sticks out to me when reading something, and that word is usually an emotion, or something that I feel during the verse. All I read here was RAGE, or something to that extent. Something angry. Which is okay, but again, like I said with other votes. This isn't the first round of some random tournament. And I feel that going against better writers, you'll have to tweak something, so insignificant (which i think you did) but something that'll work to your advantage. It's not formulaic. So you'll just have to figure that out, but the process in doing so may prove to be differential. Like other writers, they always give you a feel. Some write about the same things, but it's always layered with tidbits of emotion, tiny capsules of relics, nuances, beautifully hand woven thoughts. This was just in 6th gear towards angry the entire way, well atleast so far as I have quoted.

Max’s psyche continued to decide his next step
Guiding him on his heart-wrenching nights of distress.
Infiltrating the microstructure of the spider’s web
Conceptualizing the ultimate software virus in his head
Yet his brain felt it manifested as encephalitis instead.
Living off Tylenol, hacking .GOV proxy and firewalls,
Wired up and paranoid every time someone called.
No one believed it when everything came to a halt.
Some wolves couldn’t even face it at all
Preferring to die. The sheep blamed it on God,
The scapegoat of our faults.
No one would believe - this man in constant pain was the cause.

I liked the direction you took this in relation to the image. It's not what hurt you here, but what is doing it in this tourny so far (from what I've read) is captivation, a deviation of the norm, and the ability to feel. Also, mechanics is high up on that list, and clever, witty one liners will definitely help to move things along and shift weight. I found little, to none here, and with a grand opponent dropping one of my favorite verses from a topical standpoint, in awhile. I think you just failed to deliver something super exceptional.

thanks.