Week 9: (3-3) Breathless vs. (6-2) Frank (BREATHLESS WINS 5-1)

Inno · 05-04-2016, 04:45 PM

Breathless

I dig the flow in this alot. Great opening stanza it really set the mood and cadence to the verse very well. I usually dont focus on rhyming patterns and rhythm to much in topicals because its an up and down game and never sure. Uou could have alot of rhymes and the verse makes no sense abd is boring. On the other hand you could have a long winded verse with omly end rhymes and its an amazing story. Here though both went hand in hand. That stop and go feel you had just read so lovely so smooth, making the story that much easier to read and therefore more enjoyable. Dope verse.

Frank you brought the usual and didn't disappoint. From start to finish your technique was crisp and on point. Felt like you carried that along well thru the entire verse so i have no complaints there. The story starts off rather well and continues to flow nicely towards the middle and end, most of the time. I feel like you jumped alot in sever places. Very suddenly changing the scene from one thing the next. I felt like you immersed me in one scene just to rip me away to another.

Overall

I got breathless here. Seems like he has alot less content to offer but to me his verse was spot on and kept my interest at a peak through out his verse. I went in and out with franks and felt like it could been a tad better. Dope battle though

Breathless

05-04-2016, 04:45 PM	#5
Inno Ad mini tator Join Date: Feb 2013 Posts: 10,025 Battle Record: 26-54 Champed - Lime Green Poetry Association - Black August - 1-2 Punch League Rep Power: 85899403	Breathless I dig the flow in this alot. Great opening stanza it really set the mood and cadence to the verse very well. I usually dont focus on rhyming patterns and rhythm to much in topicals because its an up and down game and never sure. Uou could have alot of rhymes and the verse makes no sense abd is boring. On the other hand you could have a long winded verse with omly end rhymes and its an amazing story. Here though both went hand in hand. That stop and go feel you had just read so lovely so smooth, making the story that much easier to read and therefore more enjoyable. Dope verse. Frank you brought the usual and didn't disappoint. From start to finish your technique was crisp and on point. Felt like you carried that along well thru the entire verse so i have no complaints there. The story starts off rather well and continues to flow nicely towards the middle and end, most of the time. I feel like you jumped alot in sever places. Very suddenly changing the scene from one thing the next. I felt like you immersed me in one scene just to rip me away to another. Overall I got breathless here. Seems like he has alot less content to offer but to me his verse was spot on and kept my interest at a peak through out his verse. I went in and out with franks and felt like it could been a tad better. Dope battle though Breathless