Week 6: Unbornbuddha vs. Timeless (TIMELESS WINS 6-1)

Adverse · 04-12-2016, 10:40 PM

timeless, I liked your verse, it was simple yet effective, and had a lot of cool imagery, I second that the ending wasn't the best, but I think the strength of the beginning is enough to carry you through that defect.

Buddah, i've never read anything from you prior to this but this verse was mad decent, I just didn't feel connected to it all, whether it be as a story or on a personal level, doesn't make it a bad verse, but I thought your focus was more on the rhymes than the description, idk just my opinion, but I feel like timeless got this one, just a better read overall.

V- timeless

04-12-2016, 10:40 PM	#6
Adverse low tide in serotonin bay Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 2,752 Battle Record: 37-28 Champed - GWL Picture Challenge - Guerrilla Writing League - Black August II Rep Power: 15446146	timeless, I liked your verse, it was simple yet effective, and had a lot of cool imagery, I second that the ending wasn't the best, but I think the strength of the beginning is enough to carry you through that defect. Buddah, i've never read anything from you prior to this but this verse was mad decent, I just didn't feel connected to it all, whether it be as a story or on a personal level, doesn't make it a bad verse, but I thought your focus was more on the rhymes than the description, idk just my opinion, but I feel like timeless got this one, just a better read overall. V- timeless