Week 4: Symetrik & Vividly Vague vs. Razah & Just Write (RAZAH & JUST WRITE WIN 5-1)

Frank · 03-30-2016, 09:02 AM

Symmetric/Vividly Vague...

Seamless fusion worth decoding. A real challenge to decipher who was who. Almost identical. The structure of the verse looked as if it was still in its developmental stages and could've benefited from going back to the drawing board. Be interested in knowing what the thought process was: how many lines were each writer permitted? If there was any order involved. Aside from the undistinguishable, I found the actual verse rather unison in its perverted, sadistic nature. Heavy on quotations and dialogue, a Vividly Vague hallmark. Symmetric held his own, even perhaps outwriting Vividly Vague in his own style. Two writers meshed. Last line really irked me cause it didn't rhyme, felt poorly executed after such a deliberate rhyming, but after some contemplating I can appreciate the off beat edge it gave your piece. Reminded me of a Snuff Film.

Razah/Just Write...

Simplified sap. I really liked the tone as the piece reached its climax. Uplifting message. From a a purely technical stand point, it was not exciting enough for me. Decent story telling though, I can tell by the moving and inspirational agenda that Just Write wrote the better part of the latter half. The verse is deeply rooted in sentimental value and capitalized greatly in that regard. However, this type of verse has been done to death. Solid depiction, nonetheless.

MVGT Sym/Viv

03-30-2016, 09:02 AM	#9
Frank Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 3,228 Champed - NWL Season 2 - Art of Writing League (5x) - Lime Green Poetry Association - AOWL Season 6 - AOWL Season 10 Rep Power: 3853347	Symmetric/Vividly Vague... Seamless fusion worth decoding. A real challenge to decipher who was who. Almost identical. The structure of the verse looked as if it was still in its developmental stages and could've benefited from going back to the drawing board. Be interested in knowing what the thought process was: how many lines were each writer permitted? If there was any order involved. Aside from the undistinguishable, I found the actual verse rather unison in its perverted, sadistic nature. Heavy on quotations and dialogue, a Vividly Vague hallmark. Symmetric held his own, even perhaps outwriting Vividly Vague in his own style. Two writers meshed. Last line really irked me cause it didn't rhyme, felt poorly executed after such a deliberate rhyming, but after some contemplating I can appreciate the off beat edge it gave your piece. Reminded me of a Snuff Film. Razah/Just Write... Simplified sap. I really liked the tone as the piece reached its climax. Uplifting message. From a a purely technical stand point, it was not exciting enough for me. Decent story telling though, I can tell by the moving and inspirational agenda that Just Write wrote the better part of the latter half. The verse is deeply rooted in sentimental value and capitalized greatly in that regard. However, this type of verse has been done to death. Solid depiction, nonetheless. MVGT Sym/Viv __________________ *VETWORK*