Week 1: Mr. J vs. Adonis (MR. J WINS 5-4)

UnbornBuddha · 03-06-2016, 02:37 PM

Wow, I really enjoyed both takes.

Mr J: You set a conscientious pace of diction that was filled with an ominous aura. This Darlene character essentially hurt herself, and her husband came to see his beloved's pain or demise unfold. The actual pacing and literary techniques you knowingly or unknowingly chose to unravel this, ultimately had an intentionality that was almost sadistic in nature. Nevertheless, despite the ghoulish feel it still had this beautiful connotation vis a vis te imagery involved.

Adonis: I am glad you are able to solely compete, the extra time that you have now shows itself in the quality of the material. Anyways, HA HA HA HA, I guess Mr. J did get under your skin. I mean the intention of this piece is clear as day, yet it was done in this way that maintained a separation, so as to be able to be interpreted separately in another light, that is if one chose to. I also liked the subtle bolding of the J with this words that are genial in nature, jovial and the like. Words that fit the archetype of Netcee's jester. I liked this, made me become filled with delight due to the subtlety involved and the passive aggressiveness at present.

In one had, I really enjoyed Mr. J's pacing and direction, his writing was stronger due to the tone and pacing he maintained. Yet, Adonis piece and the direction of attack he chose is too much to ignore. And so I cast my vote for:

V/ Adonis

03-06-2016, 02:37 PM	#4
UnbornBuddha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2014 Posts: 1,008 Battle Record: 23-10 Champed - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 5 Rep Power: 23856379	Wow, I really enjoyed both takes. Mr J: You set a conscientious pace of diction that was filled with an ominous aura. This Darlene character essentially hurt herself, and her husband came to see his beloved's pain or demise unfold. The actual pacing and literary techniques you knowingly or unknowingly chose to unravel this, ultimately had an intentionality that was almost sadistic in nature. Nevertheless, despite the ghoulish feel it still had this beautiful connotation vis a vis te imagery involved. Adonis: I am glad you are able to solely compete, the extra time that you have now shows itself in the quality of the material. Anyways, HA HA HA HA, I guess Mr. J did get under your skin. I mean the intention of this piece is clear as day, yet it was done in this way that maintained a separation, so as to be able to be interpreted separately in another light, that is if one chose to. I also liked the subtle bolding of the J with this words that are genial in nature, jovial and the like. Words that fit the archetype of Netcee's jester. I liked this, made me become filled with delight due to the subtlety involved and the passive aggressiveness at present. In one had, I really enjoyed Mr. J's pacing and direction, his writing was stronger due to the tone and pacing he maintained. Yet, Adonis piece and the direction of attack he chose is too much to ignore. And so I cast my vote for: V/ Adonis