Freedom in Debt

EndSane · 04-28-2013, 02:45 AM

This was pretty good but as I read I got a tad bit disinterested. Not saying is wasnt good because it was true to the nature of the topic. Thought u may have just rhymed a little too much and took away content. But being on rr for a bit I would rather read a bunch of fucking rhymes then a complete story with very few rhymes and half the time aren't even Multies..

It stayed on topic and had a good vibe too it.. Didnt really care for the closer thought you could of ended on a tad better note tbh. Something more concrete I guess but a rally good verse nevertheless. I would defly read again and I did twice. Like I said tho maybe add a little more content and imagery but it's hard when u are actually rhyming so it didnt take away from it too much...

Good shit

04-28-2013, 02:45 AM	#5
EndSane Member Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 88 Battle Record: 0-1 Champed Challenge Week I Challenge Week II Challenge Week III Challenge Week IV Challenge Week V Challenge Week VI Challenge Week VII Challenge Week VIII Challenge Week IX Challenge Week X Rep Power: 38	This was pretty good but as I read I got a tad bit disinterested. Not saying is wasnt good because it was true to the nature of the topic. Thought u may have just rhymed a little too much and took away content. But being on rr for a bit I would rather read a bunch of fucking rhymes then a complete story with very few rhymes and half the time aren't even Multies.. It stayed on topic and had a good vibe too it.. Didnt really care for the closer thought you could of ended on a tad better note tbh. Something more concrete I guess but a rally good verse nevertheless. I would defly read again and I did twice. Like I said tho maybe add a little more content and imagery but it's hard when u are actually rhyming so it didnt take away from it too much... Good shit