Dr Dog vs Zen (Zen wins)

fraze · 07-13-2015, 06:36 AM

Zen: Short and sweet. Packed with meaning. Simple with complexity. Definitely worth a second read... or third or fourth. But the slavery reference seems out of place for the revolutionary war. Minor quibble, but that had me distracted a little. But I enjoyed the flavor of your piece like topical skittles.

Dr. Dog: Dope start. Mean that with my whole heart. Dense prose with layered with meaning in that first part. But then the piece started losing steam. I wish you stuck with the original theme. I think you were trying to connect one revolution to the other using the highways a bridging metaphor. But apologies, I could have settled for a little less road work and more etymology.

Vote: Zen - But I think I would have chosen Dr. Dog, if his piece had been more consistent. But props to you both I enjoyed reading what you've written.

07-13-2015, 06:36 AM	#11
fraze Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Louisville, KY Posts: 972 Battle Record: 14-24 Rep Power: 32898726	Zen: Short and sweet. Packed with meaning. Simple with complexity. Definitely worth a second read... or third or fourth. But the slavery reference seems out of place for the revolutionary war. Minor quibble, but that had me distracted a little. But I enjoyed the flavor of your piece like topical skittles. Dr. Dog: Dope start. Mean that with my whole heart. Dense prose with layered with meaning in that first part. But then the piece started losing steam. I wish you stuck with the original theme. I think you were trying to connect one revolution to the other using the highways a bridging metaphor. But apologies, I could have settled for a little less road work and more etymology. Vote: Zen - But I think I would have chosen Dr. Dog, if his piece had been more consistent. But props to you both I enjoyed reading what you've written. __________________