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05-20-2015, 10:43 PM
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#2 |
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The Clown Prince
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,046
Battle Record: 35-45
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 59349682   |
I stopped reading after the second 'passed away'
I may come back to this at a later time but out of respect I am here.. and not to be a total dick I feel like your wording is crisp the build up of the first few lines after the intro is smooth but that little slip up just made me feel dirty...keep writing
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