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Old 04-19-2013, 03:11 AM   #14
Red glare
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Man I had a detailed explanation, but it took me 15 minutes and the shit logged me off,, Keith need to handle that like he done id this battle. Objective was ehh. Disposable verse,, No depth to the concepts,, I couldn't be fooled; I'm not searching for the golden lining. If it ain't there I'm not making vangough work out of your shit. Keith was ambitiously epic,, Though not grounded in concentration, failing to tie the story together,, 3 seperate stories but no over casting arch to engulf idea. A few correlating lines could have brought all 3 stanzas to a triangle that would rival the pyramid on a dollar bill. Work on that.

v/ king keith

Last edited by Red glare; 04-19-2013 at 03:13 AM.
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