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Old 10-06-2014, 01:23 AM   #14
Pent uP
Robin Williams of Fallen Victims
 
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Campbell -- the topic is boring...a little tried and true. ..I think the concept was a little disconnected from the topic. It was nice to see u attempt the lyricism that you did but I feel like it was pretty sophomoric in the end. I liked what you tries to do but I dont think the product was "There"

Ydk -- I liked the writing...it was borderline strong. The ending felt like too much...you made too much happen and it muddled the verse. Up until the end it was a steady set of ideas building up and then BOOM drop useless bombs..idk couldve been wrapped up better

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Last edited by Pent uP; 10-06-2014 at 01:27 AM.
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