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Old 03-31-2013, 03:31 PM   #1
Nigma
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Default The Book of Jinn and Genies

The Book of Jinn and Genies


Behold the Sphinx; this here is an ode to kings
Donating souls, I bring them gold from Minskt
Wholesome prince, the last kin active, throne in eclipse
Metaphorical foe that persists, twisted horrors in kids
Smashing through glorious castles like Kraken through masts
Acid attacking growth from an enfant corroding decicion
Light of the cross shines an open window hopelessly driven
Aligning chakras minding good and evil, grow in the middle
I was taught by the author I should notice the symbols
Trees, life. Oceans, soul. Combine and move on
With three eyes focused you may find ya may not like what ya saw
Lightning is falling when it signal off the light and knowledge
When quakes are violently spawned, war is likely to follow
Grinding might be alarming, some ponder if its right or its wrong
Either light or it's dark, night or the dawn - crusts pull with diety arms
But those survivors live on, cut throats who violent in thought
Up close their eyes look on to the sight, utmost giant of storms
Uh oh! The Lions been charmed, rush home tonight and succumb to it
The catalysts of this is species which is stuck full of utter twits
The beasts are the government breeding out demon incumbants
That feed off freedom and will until their greed is uncovered
Do you feel like a person? Cause you're sheeple to others
I see when valiant in force, they will crown the immortals
Message soundless yet warns like when pounding in morse code
Beauty born with a sword close, cold thorns on a warm rose
Discovered the mason culture in the Brazen Altar's lore
So, that's praying in award shows, who say that they adore you
Its paying for support, playing vulture villain for who don't change
Till skin decays within a dark tomb and fades off into charcoal
Plainly put, our hopes plagued, I'm blaming the apostles


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Old 04-01-2013, 01:35 PM   #2
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Haven't read it all but I figured I'd correct the title..

*Djinn
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Old 04-01-2013, 07:27 PM   #3
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In Islam it is spelled Jinn. @Whys Ways clean the foam off your mustache and read the verse, sir.
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Old 04-01-2013, 07:31 PM   #4
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LOOOLLLLL NERDS
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Old 04-01-2013, 07:41 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Split View Post
LOOOLLLLL NERDS
I'll cut you
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Old 04-02-2013, 10:00 AM   #6
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Possible variations on spelling aside, this was great. Becoming more familiar with your style of writing I think I am better appreciating it. One thing is, your rhyme choice is always unexpected. E.g., grow in the middle - notice the symbols & warm rose - morse code & the last two lines. As for content it was focused and warning without becoming too preaching or condescending. Presented your message in a good descriptive way.
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:38 PM   #7
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@zygote Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad you feel like you are getting more familiar with my style because I feel as though I'm reacquainting with it. I think Xces (Mayhem), yourself, and I should partake in an epic SvW nostalgia collab.
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Old 04-05-2013, 09:34 PM   #8
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@Nigma

You've got some of the best dynamic flow patterns on the site. Unorthodox, but flexible. It follows through like a non-traditional psychadelic mushroom mixed into some brown onion soup. Which is making me hungry.

"That feed off freedom and will until their greed is uncovered
Do you feel like a person? Cause you're sheeple to others"
^Tite.

Keep doing yume
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Old 04-06-2013, 08:35 PM   #9
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Thank you very much Vulgar
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Old 04-08-2013, 01:39 PM   #10
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Just now peeping this Nigma and I have to say I'm very impressed. I think zygote said this but your rhyme choice is always unexpected. You have a unique way with words and along with a unique style and you embrace it fully and that's what makes your pieces resonate very well. Top notch piece here. A few minor hiccups in terms of some lines being too wordy for my taste but I usually find that in almost anyone's verse I read lol. Great work here man.

Acid attacking growth from an enfant corroding decicion
Light of the cross shines an open window hopelessly driven
Aligning chakras minding good and evil, grow in the middle
I was taught by the author I should notice the symbols
^^^Really enjoyed this section.
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Old 04-11-2013, 08:53 PM   #11
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Uppin once more! Appreciate all the feed
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Old 04-13-2013, 11:25 PM   #12
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Behold the Sphinx; this here is an ode to kings
Donating souls, I bring them gold from Minskt
Wholesome prince, the last kin active, throne in eclipse

Cool opening. 'Throne eclipsed' popped in my head after I read the last line. Would've been smoother and more of mesh of words Boggle pop of rhymes. Still very fun for everybody the way it stands.

Aligning chakras minding good and evil, grow in the middle
I was taught by the author I should notice the symbols

Grow in the middle was meh, but that second line was cool. Sort of ominous but on the surface innocent enough.

But those survivors live on, cut throats who violent in thought
Up close their eyes look on to the sight, utmost giant of storms
Uh oh! The Lions been charmed,
rush home tonight and succumb to it

Liked the bold. The italicized text put me off although it did help the flow of reading it. Read it as a staccato. This also highlights a problem of some shit seeming not to rhyme, though. I can catch soft rhymes and all that jazz and you definitely vary your scheme enough to keep everything smooth but certain spots were tricky.

Beauty born with a sword close, cold thorns on a warm rose

Well worded.


What does it mean? I'm dumb. Fun to read, though, and overall good. You're a very special person.

Overall this was good.
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