AOWL Week 7 Champ: Frank (5-0) vs. Red glare (4-1) [FRANK WINS, 12-1.]

Vulgar · 04-02-2013, 06:23 PM

Red glare - You said that you were from PR but I really can't tie your writing to someone specific. You have quality instincts for imagery, underlying meaning and covering up the trail - I believe you use excessive semicolons to disguise your alias, lol. I could be wrong though. One thing is for certain: you have a very fan friendly style with a rich endowment to it. The verse direction was cool. I saw it as a comic book snippet with a stylish ending; very episodal, dashing in some African sci fi to top it all off in a left-field way. However, I don't think something like this is a good strategem to beating Frank. From what it looks like, he wrote a full bodied verse, possibly a story which will likely beat this. I think this verse would sound good on a track.

Frank - The first time I read this I hated it. Now after a second read it's much better than the first time. Pretty effortlessly told, very scenic and it had a purpose to the long, drawn out rhyme scheme which I tire of from you. I liked that you took that route this time because you didn't want to veer off from the story for a moment, or you/the reader might lose focus. This was good stuff - good enough for the win this round.

Vote - Frank

I think he outdid Red flare here with mere execution. Rhyme for rhyme you both were about even. Sometimes Frank's off multis throw off the entire verse for me and I have to reread, but his story itself was fluid and I liked the result.

04-02-2013, 06:23 PM	#17
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Red glare - You said that you were from PR but I really can't tie your writing to someone specific. You have quality instincts for imagery, underlying meaning and covering up the trail - I believe you use excessive semicolons to disguise your alias, lol. I could be wrong though. One thing is for certain: you have a very fan friendly style with a rich endowment to it. The verse direction was cool. I saw it as a comic book snippet with a stylish ending; very episodal, dashing in some African sci fi to top it all off in a left-field way. However, I don't think something like this is a good strategem to beating Frank. From what it looks like, he wrote a full bodied verse, possibly a story which will likely beat this. I think this verse would sound good on a track. Frank - The first time I read this I hated it. Now after a second read it's much better than the first time. Pretty effortlessly told, very scenic and it had a purpose to the long, drawn out rhyme scheme which I tire of from you. I liked that you took that route this time because you didn't want to veer off from the story for a moment, or you/the reader might lose focus. This was good stuff - good enough for the win this round. Vote - Frank I think he outdid Red flare here with mere execution. Rhyme for rhyme you both were about even. Sometimes Frank's off multis throw off the entire verse for me and I have to reread, but his story itself was fluid and I liked the result.