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09-01-2014, 02:14 AM
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#1 |
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Mad fucking dangerous.
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12,066
Battle Record: 40-19
Champed - AOWL Season 3
- Art of Writing League (2x)
Rep Power: 85899406   |
Your verse had an NFL Films feel to it. I liked it, but I didn't think it hit the topic all that cleanly. The alliteration was a good touch, and you clearly won. But you'll have to build characters better against oats.
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I'm just swinging swords strictly based on keyboards, unbalanced like elephants and ants on seesaws. |
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