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#1 |
Steel Cut
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 5,084
Battle Record: 19-10
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To Whom it May Dismiss,
I hear the universe exists - inside of proofs and formulas as numerical reflections deciphered through your corneas which means the expanses I've traveled and tragically sworn to love are simply masks in the attic mathematically boarded shut but too much has been invested to accept this rigid receipt that each breath in its essence is just a set of digits repeating every second stripped of its meaning, retreating to logic's ordered peak and though the edge of the cliff is appealing, please...look before you leap To Whom it May Discredit, I presume it's unsafe to edit an established axiom- and answer to the annals you'd have to retract it from you'll face a marathon of laughter when you suggest to subtract a sum but perhaps another answer would advantage the path they run for example: PE=mgh is one that's proved with ease; if you stand tall, you should become what you believe which makes sense, but the secret that is wonderful to see is that potential increases when you're humbled to your knees nothin' you achieve's simple as arithmetic progress besides, reaching potential tends to be a kinetic process this systemic logic is a palatable scheme but now you see not every formula's infallible as it seems To Whom it May Enrage, The truth will stain this page, engraving its signature and make you rearrange the names for what you label as miniature your preconceptions and intuitions may be wading within the dirt, for every trait of nature you can't contain in an integer like f=ma is a linear way to state the greatness massive acceleration delivers- but some of the most persuasive statements came in shades of a whisper the truth can raise or fade away like the banks of a river needless to say that either way it makes a painful elixir To Whom it May Concern, It can be a foolish way to learn, to walk the edge of unusual but this message is suitable... numbers and letters'll never capture the essence of beautiful though curiosity compels you to discover how it truly works I beg you - don't ruin the wonders of the universe like y=x^2, a fact that so accurately maps gravity, it's brilliant but not everything falls down - that's humanity's resilience knowledge without perspective is threat we can't afford to keep so remember...look in every direction before you leap
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You should be water |
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#2 |
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Join Date: Aug 2013
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Is this from the AOWL?
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http://split8.yolasite.com |
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#4 |
Mad fucking dangerous.
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12,066
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Sometimes your positivity kills me. I'm just a negative person. But I liked this for its bounciness. There were points where the flow was a bit stiff and stilted, particularly when you upped the complexity of the scheme but didn't quite balance out stressed and unstressed syllables. I think the sound of the words is one thing you could probably work on. For instance, Split is very good at that. But your directness and earnestness are praise-worthy. No one writes like this on these sites, at least not anyone half as good as you. I do wonder if you're burning a straw man to a degree with this one.
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I'm just swinging swords strictly based on keyboards, unbalanced like elephants and ants on seesaws. |
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#5 |
Steel Cut
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 5,084
Battle Record: 19-10
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@Certain "burning a straw man" - can you explain? I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at tbh.
Will return feed, obv
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You should be water |
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#6 | |
Mad fucking dangerous.
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 12,066
Battle Record: 40-19
Champed - AOWL Season 3
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![]() Quote:
I'm just not sure anyone tries to define the world the way you're arguing against. |
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#7 |
Steel Cut
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 5,084
Battle Record: 19-10
Accomplishments - OM HOF (2x)
Champed - Fight Night LXXXIV
- Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 79005428 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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Oh I know what a straw man argument is, wasn't sure what exactly you meant. I see what you're saying now though, thanks for the feed.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5WPGoA_c1Qo @Certain - pretty weak performance, admittedly, but gives a good sense of how the words fall together, in my head at least.
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You should be water Last edited by oats; 08-26-2014 at 02:36 AM. |
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