the dam

[Vulgar]

The ending wasn't up to par with the whole piece for me. That's one criticism I have for this; otherwise I like personal pieces like this that create a world, characters, a landscape to grasp hold of. Children and dialogue also mixes well with literary fiction, and this medium as well. I liked the building blocks, but it could've been better, honestly. Keep working with your style.

[Pharaohs Army]

Originally Posted by Vulgar

The ending wasn't up to par with the whole piece for me. That's one criticism I have for this; otherwise I like personal pieces like this that create a world, characters, a landscape to grasp hold of. Children and dialogue also mixes well with literary fiction, and this medium as well. I liked the building blocks, but it could've been better, honestly. Keep working with your style.

Thx. Yeah I did draw from personal experience the pic reminded me of. I did rush the end a bit, meaning i intended to do an abrupt ending, but i didn't put the necessary work into said ending.
Thing is, it's not my style, tbh. But point taken, and i will heed the recommendation. It's part of growing I suppose... trying new things in writing...new styles.