AOWL Week 6: Brass Body (0-0) VS. TopicalDood5 (0-0) [TOPICALDOOD5 wins, 8-3.]

[IamBenT]

Tough.

Brass - I love your flow and multis, very vivid imagery and great use of writing in a circle to end it and paint a very poignant picture that many older *ahem* folks such as myself can relate to. I like your creativity in terms of applying to the topic the concept of boxer as scholar of pain, but the link wasn't as clear as i would have liked to see. A couple of places near the end that could have been cleaned up imo lyrically but a very strong sense of voice throughout.

Topical - great diction, your imagery is stellar and the first half of this verse could stand up against anything I have read so far this week. Multis are creative and original, only problem I really had was that some of the wording could have been altered to make your lines not stand out and seem as awkward, when you get that down you shall be a beast indeed. Ending was great too

Vote -TopicalDood5, better overall verse, terrible screen name though lol jp man Good battle from the both of youse