Week 11: 5. Perpendicular (1-0) vs. 6. Frank (7-3) \\ Frank wins 5-3

Adonis · 05-11-2014, 05:25 PM

Frank - I did not like the use of "Walmart" some 5-6 times in opening lines, just a bit overkill. I liked the concept of a test, but as far as the verse goes I'll be completely honest. There just wasn't anything to it for me. I mean its about a girl, who you explain is gorgeous due to plastic, who takes a test and isn't ready but wants to be a good mom. End.

P- I loved the progression man, you literally went from first date to marriage in like 4 bars then a kid. I think you did this well enough. I enjoyed the detail and scenery's you painted e.g dinner table with parents, sweety palms of nervousness trying to impress. Many more instances as such with only a bar. Overall dope verse, you both went for kind of the same thing here which is weird

V/PerpDick

Overall a better verse in my eyes.

05-11-2014, 05:25 PM	#6
Adonis Tsk Tsk Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Beer Goggles Posts: 4,834 Battle Record: 36-34 Champed - Lime Green Poetry Association - NFL Pick'em 2016-17 Rep Power: 9946449	Frank - I did not like the use of "Walmart" some 5-6 times in opening lines, just a bit overkill. I liked the concept of a test, but as far as the verse goes I'll be completely honest. There just wasn't anything to it for me. I mean its about a girl, who you explain is gorgeous due to plastic, who takes a test and isn't ready but wants to be a good mom. End. P- I loved the progression man, you literally went from first date to marriage in like 4 bars then a kid. I think you did this well enough. I enjoyed the detail and scenery's you painted e.g dinner table with parents, sweety palms of nervousness trying to impress. Many more instances as such with only a bar. Overall dope verse, you both went for kind of the same thing here which is weird V/PerpDick Overall a better verse in my eyes. __________________ I'm tryna fuck like A-don-is TUPAC SHAKUR