Week 4: YDK (2-1) vs. Adonis (2-1) \\ YDK wins 5-3

Just Write · 03-22-2014, 03:39 AM

Damn adonis,

I really loved this piece. Each portion had its moments and your the reason im really beginning to like short bar style although I suck at it. But if I can be honest with you man, as great of a piece I think you wrote again, same as last week it's very hard to connect your piece to the topic and with this being a topical battle league it makes it very hard to vote for someone who doesn't connect with the topic. The paint on the walls of the brain was just ridiculously sick.

YDK, damn bro, I see just mad improvement week after week with you. I enjoyed your storyline and thought the flow was pretty good too. My only gripe is that if the boys mom died giving birth this kid is notgoing to be that distraught over it at the age of 5-6. I have a six year old who is smart as fuck and i know what he understands and doesnt and I just dont see that happening. Other than that I thought you played to the topic pretty well, maybe too safe but I still think you pulled it off

This is hard, adonis your piece was brilliant I just dont see the connection with the topic picture, I do see the connection to just art and being an artist in general but for me that wasnt enough, im surprised tbh but mvgt=ydk

03-22-2014, 03:39 AM	#1
Just Write Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Posts: 1,709 Battle Record: 9-12 Rep Power: 4997617	Damn adonis, I really loved this piece. Each portion had its moments and your the reason im really beginning to like short bar style although I suck at it. But if I can be honest with you man, as great of a piece I think you wrote again, same as last week it's very hard to connect your piece to the topic and with this being a topical battle league it makes it very hard to vote for someone who doesn't connect with the topic. The paint on the walls of the brain was just ridiculously sick. YDK, damn bro, I see just mad improvement week after week with you. I enjoyed your storyline and thought the flow was pretty good too. My only gripe is that if the boys mom died giving birth this kid is notgoing to be that distraught over it at the age of 5-6. I have a six year old who is smart as fuck and i know what he understands and doesnt and I just dont see that happening. Other than that I thought you played to the topic pretty well, maybe too safe but I still think you pulled it off This is hard, adonis your piece was brilliant I just dont see the connection with the topic picture, I do see the connection to just art and being an artist in general but for me that wasnt enough, im surprised tbh but mvgt=ydk __________________