Week 2: sacrifice (0-1) vs. Objective (0-1) \\ sacrifice wins 6-5

oats · 03-09-2014, 08:25 PM

On my phone so apologies for the brevity.

Objective you took a pretty literal angle of waking up in time to see an actual revolution. I liked the story, but there wasn't much to it for me. A little predictable, with no sticking point of insight or emotion that lingered with me.

Sac you took a more personal spin on revolution as a change of lifestyle, the revolution being kicking an addiction. I liked that angle more, and a lot of individual lines and ideas stuck out to me. On top of that, you had the better writing in terms of rhythm and rhyme schemes.

To me, sacrifice had the more interesting concept and more engaging writing, so he gets my vote.

03-09-2014, 08:25 PM	#6
oats Steel Cut Join Date: May 2013 Posts: 5,084 Battle Record: 19-10 Accomplishments - OM HOF (2x) Champed - Fight Night LXXXIV - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 79005428	On my phone so apologies for the brevity. Objective you took a pretty literal angle of waking up in time to see an actual revolution. I liked the story, but there wasn't much to it for me. A little predictable, with no sticking point of insight or emotion that lingered with me. Sac you took a more personal spin on revolution as a change of lifestyle, the revolution being kicking an addiction. I liked that angle more, and a lot of individual lines and ideas stuck out to me. On top of that, you had the better writing in terms of rhythm and rhyme schemes. To me, sacrifice had the more interesting concept and more engaging writing, so he gets my vote. __________________ You should be water