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03-05-2014, 01:29 AM
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SOBER
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 12,480
Battle Record: 2-5
Champed - AOWL Season 2
Rep Power: 85899407   |
I really liked 'This was exciting!"
The last portion (the section that started with what I quoted) was the best. You had some weird punctuation and it seemed like you were trying too hard. Some of it didn't make sense because you were trying to be too poetic and some of it didnt make sense because you were too focused on rhyme.
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Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder |
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