AOWL WK 3: Vinzr (0-0) VS. Aesthetic (0-0) [VINZR WINS, 7-1.]

Inno · 02-28-2013, 10:07 PM

Aesthetic

you had a cool piece man. great imagery and flow to it. the scenerio wa painted nicely and your story came across easily. you had some cool wording at some points and some pretty dope lines scattered all through this piece. the essence, people line was fucking dope man. the story progressed nicely as well though at times it felt like it was going a bit fast it was cool. the first part is my fav so far man wasnt really feeling the written part. it felt flat and uninteresting...first part was dope man.

vinzr

your wording and scheme are on fucking point man you had some dope shit going through out this. the progression and transitions from line to line was smooth as fuck tho. but i felt like this didnt really have to much direction as far as story goes..i mean the rhyming itself and the words you chose fit well and meshed, but felt like the stroy didnt really develop for me..also that last line tbh doesnt really fit for me. the rest of the piece.. i picture a city being taken over by an enemy...breaching the city and taking over..good shit.

overall

i got Aesthetic taking this. i thought his story came across a bit easier with the same amount of skill vinzr came with. the written part hurt aesthetic but i felt he did enough to take the W. vin had some dope rhyming but i felt his story lack and for that im voting for thetic.

02-28-2013, 10:07 PM	#7
Inno Ad mini tator Join Date: Feb 2013 Posts: 10,025 Battle Record: 26-54 Champed - Lime Green Poetry Association - Black August - 1-2 Punch League Rep Power: 85899403	Aesthetic you had a cool piece man. great imagery and flow to it. the scenerio wa painted nicely and your story came across easily. you had some cool wording at some points and some pretty dope lines scattered all through this piece. the essence, people line was fucking dope man. the story progressed nicely as well though at times it felt like it was going a bit fast it was cool. the first part is my fav so far man wasnt really feeling the written part. it felt flat and uninteresting...first part was dope man. vinzr your wording and scheme are on fucking point man you had some dope shit going through out this. the progression and transitions from line to line was smooth as fuck tho. but i felt like this didnt really have to much direction as far as story goes..i mean the rhyming itself and the words you chose fit well and meshed, but felt like the stroy didnt really develop for me..also that last line tbh doesnt really fit for me. the rest of the piece.. i picture a city being taken over by an enemy...breaching the city and taking over..good shit. overall i got Aesthetic taking this. i thought his story came across a bit easier with the same amount of skill vinzr came with. the written part hurt aesthetic but i felt he did enough to take the W. vin had some dope rhyming but i felt his story lack and for that im voting for thetic.