no good!, what's good? I believe Mr. J if I'm correct, is referring to the lack of content- this is an extremely short drop. It's very difficult for people to really give you some quality feedback if there isn't too much to critique. It would have been better if you posted a full verse at least then ask for feedback, because whenever you do post the full thing, people may not bother giving you feed or you won't get much. Just a note.
Aside from that, this definitely could work for audio, especially if delivered well. I liked the Bruce Lee line. When you do put a whole piece together, I would suggest adding more of those kinda lines to really make the verse stand out when you record. The more content you drop within, the better. I'll be on the lookout.
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