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Old 10-05-2013, 04:58 PM   #9
Certain
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Darth Yoda is my friend, and I like him most. But you're OK. I don't play word games on my smart phone, so we probably won't ever be friends.

This verse read like something BWHAHA would write because it had a lot of multiple-syllable rhymes like something Void would write but then it had the sexual murder content like Zombie. BWHAHA seems to be somewhere between Void and Zombie, but he might be better. No one really writes like you except your friends who may not be your friends and may instead be you using other names or may be people you don't know whom you've formed aliances with to confuse us here. That's fine anyway. I like your style a lot because it's all over the place but in a good way.

I read Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe recently. It's a great book, and I think you'd like it. He uses a lot of stop-and-start writing and exclamation points, which I used to hate. But you use exclamation point and stop-and-start writing, too. Maybe you're also Tom Wolfe. That would be interesting. Either way, I think the use of this style makes the jumpiness of it all feel intense and confused and good, sort of like a swirling My Bloody Valentine song with that central voice holding it all together.

I didn't think you needed to put words in italics. I know what shapes are and would have been able to connect those shapes. It makes me wonder if some of the other connections I draw in your verses are actually unintentional, not that intent really should define the value of art.

Sometimes your words make little sense. Mostly you're creating loosely associated images. But you write them with such clarity that they feel important, even if they inevitably aren't. I'd like to see you write about one thing sometime, though.
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