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Zen · 10-04-2013, 09:59 PM

This piece is what I mean about you tugging at people's emotions with each one of your pieces lol. At first glance I thought this was gonna be a happy story with the teenage football captain who was a fucking genius at the same time, but then this shit got dark REAL QUICK. The kid had a fucked up life and the lines you used to describe that life were the most powerful like they had cameras on him, played football to hide the bruises but the most powerful one was the line about lying to himself in the mirror. Great piece of work here and it was a damn shame it was no showed. Stay active in the league man.

Feed here would be appreciated.
http://www.netcees.co/showthread.php?t=21408 @Just Write

10-04-2013, 09:59 PM	#3
Zen Arm the Homeless Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,102 Battle Record: 22-24 Champed - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 35079722	This piece is what I mean about you tugging at people's emotions with each one of your pieces lol. At first glance I thought this was gonna be a happy story with the teenage football captain who was a fucking genius at the same time, but then this shit got dark REAL QUICK. The kid had a fucked up life and the lines you used to describe that life were the most powerful like they had cameras on him, played football to hide the bruises but the most powerful one was the line about lying to himself in the mirror. Great piece of work here and it was a damn shame it was no showed. Stay active in the league man. Feed here would be appreciated. http://www.netcees.co/showthread.php?t=21408 @Just Write Last edited by Zen; 10-04-2013 at 10:09 PM.