Week 2 - Innovator (0-1) vs. Zenland (0-1) - ZENLAND WINS 6-0

NYCSPITZ · 10-04-2013, 09:22 PM

I thought inno's was a dope concept that I resonated with. This section in particular was fucking ill:

The hypocritical think alike until they reach that brink
disturbing that perpetual bliss, refurbishing natures kiss.
Replacing the flesh to place first in the rat race's chase.
Promises of the future with billion gig computers
the limit of the skies and million men commuters.

^^^ nasty, a William Gibson-eque appraisal of humanity's future. the delivery here was nasty and I could see a clear picture of mega skyscrapers filled with human automatons in my mind's eye. To be honest though, I thought it was by far the best section of your piece. If you would have kept this up you would have taken this but the other parts lagged behind.

Zen was a nice little lol piece with a cool story. Inno was cool but the fragmented, sometimes incoherent nature of his verse leads me to give zen the slight edge]\

V/ Zen

10-04-2013, 09:22 PM	#6
NYCSPITZ SYRACUSE Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,031 Battle Record: 31-37 Champed - Write Night II - Alias Topical Tournament Rep Power: 4743547	I thought inno's was a dope concept that I resonated with. This section in particular was fucking ill: The hypocritical think alike until they reach that brink disturbing that perpetual bliss, refurbishing natures kiss. Replacing the flesh to place first in the rat race's chase. Promises of the future with billion gig computers the limit of the skies and million men commuters. ^^^ nasty, a William Gibson-eque appraisal of humanity's future. the delivery here was nasty and I could see a clear picture of mega skyscrapers filled with human automatons in my mind's eye. To be honest though, I thought it was by far the best section of your piece. If you would have kept this up you would have taken this but the other parts lagged behind. Zen was a nice little lol piece with a cool story. Inno was cool but the fragmented, sometimes incoherent nature of his verse leads me to give zen the slight edge]\ V/ Zen