"Quantum Meruit"

Vulgar · 08-19-2013, 11:47 PM

Entertaining but sort of a chore to read. The rhyme scheme gets tired for me, like you're stretching Saran wrap over a long expansive field...that's the sensation this drawn out scheme leaves me with.. however, it is a testament to both your stubbornness and your skill that you stick to this weapon of yours, even if the nomenclature may be a little unfurnished. I thought this was a cool verse. The scenario wasn't really wholly convincing but the part where he fell asleep and the teacher woke him up & then called him out - everyone can relate to that who has snoozed within a dusty, quiet classroom. That was neat. Mechanically, far from perfect. Creatively, you pulled something innovative from your bag of tricks.

Thanks for the read.

Keep doing you

08-19-2013, 11:47 PM	#2
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Entertaining but sort of a chore to read. The rhyme scheme gets tired for me, like you're stretching Saran wrap over a long expansive field...that's the sensation this drawn out scheme leaves me with.. however, it is a testament to both your stubbornness and your skill that you stick to this weapon of yours, even if the nomenclature may be a little unfurnished. I thought this was a cool verse. The scenario wasn't really wholly convincing but the part where he fell asleep and the teacher woke him up & then called him out - everyone can relate to that who has snoozed within a dusty, quiet classroom. That was neat. Mechanically, far from perfect. Creatively, you pulled something innovative from your bag of tricks. Thanks for the read. Keep doing you Last edited by Vulgar; 08-20-2013 at 12:12 AM.