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#8 |
White Earl
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Title: Synopses
unfortunately, there's more to me than what i express if i could put it in words, you would think im summoning death if i sum it up in a breath, i'd suffocate fore im through imagine the hatred in me, while i contain it for you !!!!! can't hang with the truth, but i can blend with the lies if your word is your bond, why is it bending it with mine instead of defying, try to comprehend while i'm here i found my dream girl, and i wish she never appeared the devil is near, these problems run deeper than love just scratching the surface, everything beneath it is mud so i'm lethal with drugs, heartbreak -depression n rage my true love was alcohol, especially when were engaged i'm never afraid, to talk about the thoughts in my head but then again, if i talked you'd prolly all get upset cause and effect, so if realities a step i cant take drunk then alcoholics are fucced, why the hell cant they run ..? pride and paranoia, the pair that has imprisoned my soul praying for sanity, prepared to find a different approach i live in this globe, apparently designed by my demons so this air that i breath, is just another sign of my weakness I'm trying to beat this, repetitious pattern i weave my original sins, the self inflicted habits of greed i subsequently have to proceed, past the point of return I'm to clean, to relapse against my poisonous germs the voice of concern, is all the hell i hear when you speak call me possessed when ..the only evil in this mirror is me but appearance deceives, intervenes when the truth is defined and the lies, are what produces lines between you and I I used to try, and always wanted what i hated to be my love is my life, why did you have to take it from me...? the lonely life, searchin but I can't find companionship or maybe just, i don't understand what a companion is so answer this, why don't you even care my hearts hurt? not perfect yourself, but i never share those harsh words another sharp swerve and wrong turn, my vision is tunnel sure.. your a sexy beast mah, but i don't live in the jungle more innocent -humble, u take advantage of all the above layed myself on the line, just for you to walk on like a rug until lightning struck, i was to blind to see your true side in-between trust n love, is apparently where the truth lies two confused minds, ones older -and I'm tired of pain but if i go to sleep now, i just might die where I'm laying privately praying, but god's probably enjoying the show i did the devils work once, didn't think he would torture me tho i look at less fortunate folks, and i still feel no compassion even though i have a heart, it bleeds through open gashes been working hard to reach goals, won't buckle from stress but I was sent here for the struggle, and I'll suffer to death my concepts stay focused, waiting for something to change my progression remains hopeless, afraid I'm stuck in my ways I need a new trade ..just an idea that my company raised problem with that, addiction is my only companies traits I must be insane, the voice within my heads getting louder tellin me do drugs n be a failure, but I'm failing without'em counting the days going by, I'm twenty eight years deep if you live and you learn, guess you graduate when deceased i just aggravated the beast, annoying the women i love my gene pools liquor n drugs, but cant swim when I'm drunk and if that isn't enough, im drowning and hardly afloat know what its like to die, the lord pardoned me though a god awful approach, thats why i asked him for help but walk around like christ, no sense in asking myself I'm still bumping my head, and all i wanna do is react but can't climb the wall, i built when my ruins collapsed I produce an unusual laugh, everytime i notice a new brick maybe i miss the misery, and can't cope with improvement supposed to be human, but I won't accept imperfections never settle for less, yet my rep is less than impressive sexual preference, searching for an earth to hold hands with though the sex is intense, when she isn't worth my romantic romance is.. well -I'm just flirting with death and disease almost definitely, aroused by percocets like a sexual tease can't regret being clean, but doubt the demon's absenteeism humor the dead me n laugh, sort of found a happy medium hate the path its leading in, its almost like I'm ready to use but don't ever judge me, unless you've walked in 70 shoes when i get in the mood, maybe I'll change these concepts for now.. hip hop has saved me, i can't explain the logik.. i know your looking for change, but the pains what i have to feel if my world turns around, then somebody else grabbed the wheel brake pads that squeal, make it harder for me to stop movement love u hate u -fuck u trade u, I mite be lots of things -but not stupid this is hip hop music, I write the real and I'll never stray from that whats my life like?... nigga, if u had a clue you'd be afraid to ask can't explain my past, then again -who the hell ever said lifes fair? guess I'm just living my dreams out, to bad they were nightmares Title: The High School Drop Out. eyo yo eyo.... life used to be wack -fucced up n confused never wanted to do drugs but i had to use a failure who wouldnt keep his ass in school there was always something better that he had to prove mr popular, the type of kid who would stop the bus just to blow a kiss at the populus attention dephasite and never did amount to much the class clown -only stuck around just to laugh it up girls and a reputation he majored in made some friends, but all he cared about was a place to sit next to a nerd was his favorite.. so he could peek there and cheat when the grades went in he had a few A's n B's but mainly F's he was there for joke time and away for tests his personal life was a crazy mess but he made the best of a situation -stressed never did homework cuzz at home he worked he heard a buzz and he thought it was the phone at first it was the inner man, made him feel dissowned at birth just throw them headphones on before he goes bizzerk other than that -he just never had no concerns grew up pretty fucced cause he bounced around 26 or so years old and without a house so when he isnt on the streets hes from couch to couch gets locked up and tells you he was out of town his family dont fucc with'em much.. because he pulled a couple ofstunts stole money n drugs to catch a buzz -he was younger n dumb he'd take it back if he could..is what he told a couple of bums hes debating the past, hangin with the fake n the trash cuzz there the only friends he has that aint got hate for his ass so he sits there n waits, but his patience is bad thats when he finds a newport and starts takin a drag sittin there while the world just passes by ive been catergorized, as the kinda cat who should die i know i have the magic inside my girl keeps askin me 'why' ? i just gotta set aside all this blackness n pride open my eyelids -n let whats happenin ride.... chorus x's whatever...if i only knew then what i know now i never would of gave in -never would hold out now i gotta make it on my own -n its cold out i struggle everyday tuh maintain -but i know how eyo yo eyo.. out of school on the streets with nothing but the shoes on his feet he was to incomplete, but he knew his music was sweet had to get it together or life would never get any better makin moves -just so he could find some bread in december he was starving today, woke up where the garbage was laid with suicidal thoughts about a coffin n grave "i cant make it anymore" -is what he started to say then he turned around the corner -started walkin away he could smell the cash on the guy beside him so he climbed in his ride and he was reminded had to go find a job -it wasn't gone find him even though his lyrics were like fuccin diamonds tired of everybody in his face, on his case had to buy some new gear and erase the mistakes appearance intimidates and this man looks like he was raised in a cage you could find him in a cypher -ripping it off stage everybody in a distance was listening all day n anxieties the reason he isn't at all paid his confidence a little low, in the middle though little did he know.. if he met the right person he could let his shyt explode for now he lives in an asylum, of ignorance n violence it sort of reminds him of a prison environment either start up a career or this is retirement fucc that, when reality hits i punch back never fear -i have balls in my nut sack i might of left for a while -but this is my comeback im to sick with elevation, but i've developed hatred an intelligent man with very little education common sense educates him life expectancy of 28 is what they estimated given that fact he never expects to make it chorus x's whatever... if i only knew then what i know now i never would of gave in -never would hold out now i gotta make it on my own -n its cold out i struggle everyday tuh maintain -but i know how eyo.. hes a lyricist and still cant find a plug so he keeps the hennesey inside his cup hes gettin older, his hearts colder but the rhyme is tough hes gotta make something happen fore his time is up sick of being stuck in his head, where the comfort is dead when it comes to the wrong people he can run with the best he was happier before and now hes fuccin depressed he cant blame it on the drugs, hes been sober for months but hes only begun, living life knowing it sucks somethings gotta give soon, like some positive news the problem is huge... he keeps fighting for the truth, thank god hes a goon the suns falling n hes lost, disregard the impulse hes dreaming of the past, relapse -and some horrible thoughts he wakes up pretty ill, detox from the pills he stops n he chills some guy wants to know does he got any skills so he properly spills, lyrics from the top of his grill he just opened the door and closed the one with coke on the floor supposing that hes hoping for more becuzz he knows hes dope and hes sure so here's a chance to prove who he is, influencing him to put away the booze n begin living his life without hallucinogens truelly convinced, that he can find some truth in the mist hes been writing it down, sick enough to frighten the crowd but his lyrics are like the cure -human vicidin now people like him in town, n yesterday his life was in doubt i guess the moral is, even if your poor as shyt all it takes is a glimpse, and you can make some more of it chorus x's whatever... if i only knew then what i know now i never would of gave in -never would hold out now i gotta make it on my own -n its cold out i struggle everyday tuh maintain -but i know how
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-A.bove T.he R.est |
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