Brain Thief - Bars

[Darth Yoda]

You have a rhyming ability, which is good. If you want me to give you feedback on everything? I don't know.

I don't really give feedback on an audio piece, but I guess I was listening to the lyrics and try to convey and translate in a lyrical, text-read form. You have a bit of everything, but not much of it. I feel you were trying to rhyme more than actually convey a certain meaning. Well you conveyed a meaning, definitely, you had a lot of psychy, deep, space babble blah blah. Was cool. Liked it! But I felt it was more rappy, than actual just trying to tell a story.

The beat was ok, I don't really listen to rap/spoken-word stuff often.

[Brain Thief]

Originally Posted by Darth Yoda

You have a rhyming ability, which is good. If you want me to give you feedback on everything? I don't know.

I don't really give feedback on an audio piece, but I guess I was listening to the lyrics and try to convey and translate in a lyrical, text-read form. You have a bit of everything, but not much of it. I feel you were trying to rhyme more than actually convey a certain meaning. Well you conveyed a meaning, definitely, you had a lot of psychy, deep, space babble blah blah. Was cool. Liked it! But I felt it was more rappy, than actual just trying to tell a story.

The beat was ok, I don't really listen to rap/spoken-word stuff often.

Cheers for the analysis man, The first half is kind of random and then it starts to turn into a trip rap, It does feel like two verses smashed together at times. I think I'll eventually split them and elevate on both