The Oligarchy Always Ends

Sharp · 02-06-2013, 03:40 PM

Deserves more feed... hopefully mine does the job

This lived up to the high standard set by seeing Vulgar attached to an OM. The construction of the piece is all there and more. I really dug the perspective you took, definitely felt out of the ordinary even considering how many introspective pieces get posted - this was a lot something out of a play, making you an actor very effectively taking on the character. Incredibly well done.

My gold provisions, my goal, to visit a place of bold resistance
To take a humble path. Atonement for my lineage -
Even Castro knows his limits... don't pass the coca
I'll be a casanova, perhaps tending to pastures of Roman women

I thought that section really summed up the impressions I got from this piece. Thoughtful, intelligent (but not heavy-handed) use of vocabulary, with great flow and rhymes. Hopefully you post a lot more in this OM.

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02-06-2013, 03:40 PM	#5
Sharp HE / HIM / FRAC Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: PA Posts: 11,592 Battle Record: 56-21 Accomplishments - 50+ Wins Champed - The Ultimate Writer - NBL Cypher - 1-2 Punch League Rep Power: 12601538	Deserves more feed... hopefully mine does the job This lived up to the high standard set by seeing Vulgar attached to an OM. The construction of the piece is all there and more. I really dug the perspective you took, definitely felt out of the ordinary even considering how many introspective pieces get posted - this was a lot something out of a play, making you an actor very effectively taking on the character. Incredibly well done. My gold provisions, my goal, to visit a place of bold resistance To take a humble path. Atonement for my lineage - Even Castro knows his limits... don't pass the coca I'll be a casanova, perhaps tending to pastures of Roman women I thought that section really summed up the impressions I got from this piece. Thoughtful, intelligent (but not heavy-handed) use of vocabulary, with great flow and rhymes. Hopefully you post a lot more in this OM.