Language Burrier

Lars · 02-07-2014, 03:34 PM

Almost echoing Exis at the start, bonafide is pronounced bone-a-fidey over here so that rhyme seemed off to me, but after that you found the groove and hit it, Dawsons Creek line was a standout to me.

mid-section was flames, syllable count/billion bounce etc worked dope with the internal rhyme

I think the lines look longer because you would usually break each and make them into couplets but you didn't here, I've switched to Dark NC layout too so maybe its that? I dunno

the lines look longer but it still works, undoubtebly copy's steez

keep that pen moving!

02-07-2014, 03:34 PM	#5
Lars PROVEN BITER Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Wolverhampton Posts: 1,588 Battle Record: 5-0 Champed - The Winter Topical Rep Power: 1809298	Almost echoing Exis at the start, bonafide is pronounced bone-a-fidey over here so that rhyme seemed off to me, but after that you found the groove and hit it, Dawsons Creek line was a standout to me. mid-section was flames, syllable count/billion bounce etc worked dope with the internal rhyme I think the lines look longer because you would usually break each and make them into couplets but you didn't here, I've switched to Dark NC layout too so maybe its that? I dunno the lines look longer but it still works, undoubtebly copy's steez keep that pen moving! __________________ PROVEN BITER