I hate when that, you have to shit feeling hits you with no warning

[Frank Metts]

Heart beating like the 90s miami bass scene, sweat glands open up so much fema bout to cut you a check, u Gotta tighten those ass cheeks like the squirrel master got out on parole and nasty nate behind you in the shower, you got to call a quick audible and plan your attack cautiously making it to the stairs strategically taking each step with precision so the air tight seal doesn't break releasing whatever vile bowel creature is trying so ever hard to escape .. then when you make it to the toilet its like trying to jump in during double dutch at recess .. one mistake, you trip up and look foolish... slowly counting in your head waiting for that perfect opp to drop trou and in one fluid motion land perfectly on the toilet seat while evacuating excrement that resembles a golgothan so much Kevin smith considered suing for copyright infringement ...


And this is how I just spent my time on the toilet .... your welcome