12-28-2021, 03:33 PM | #1 |
He / Him / His
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 1,676
Battle Record: 20-1
Champed - Summer Classic IX
- Netcees Battle League
- Fight night 15
Rep Power: 12534702 |
Round 1 Cypher
Feel free to drop bars here. Next round's magazine will feature the best/worst/funniest/cringiest of the bunch
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12-28-2021, 10:15 PM | #3 |
Ukrainian Howlitzers
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 5,091
Battle Record: 41-24
Accomplishments - Hall of Fame
Champed - NBL Season 3
- Alias Tournament II
- Fight Night XLVIII
- Fight Night XXV
- Fight Night XV
- Fight Night (3x)
- Netcees Battle League (4x)
- NBL Tag Team Season 3
- Lyric Olympics
- 1-2 Punch League (3x)
- Battle Arena League (2x)
- Key Grand Prix 2018 1/2
- BA Tag
- NPL Roast
- Netcees Pic League
Rep Power: 17502332 |
how many times have you been smacked in the face?
my guy, you have enough Loses to offset your grandkids capital gains send your whole fam to Jesus extended clip. mags got a Longbottom Gryffindor can’t compete with creep on you undetected so i’ve got the drop.. see you in public & i'm Clicking a few Autos like i’m not a bot crime scene an absolute slaughter, local PD holding the feds back detectives lookin’ around like a confused wife...they don't know where your heads at just had docs shout ‘ur gunna be a daddy’ now i’m thrilled for the winter only Push Notification you've had is Amazon confirming "your dildo delivered" jack your drugs w/ the nine or the magnum cuz my tools be varying stick up like an admission of guilt…free you from all the weight you’ve been carrying or just snap his collarbone in half no beams n’ hollows have a doctor looking over his shoulder so much you’d swear he’s being followed & brooo your girls titties are the saddest of sights forget Dune, Arrakis something your wife’s never had in her life enter my house be prepared to eat 3 whole rounds my whole family’s strapped. even Nantucket like Spree’s hometown i take a big gulp before a presentation that ends in succession.. you take a Big Gulp cuz you can’t even afford a drink from 7-Eleven you’re still talkin stocks huh? slimey prick say your insecurities but realllly you hate being short with a tiny dick my stock options involve cashing out at the greatest price.. Ryno’s stalk options involve deciding which dude he’s gunna rape tonight dude talks crypto but bad investments are ending his dreams irony 101: the guy Pushing Coins is still eating outta vending machines it’s nothing to slump you dawgie.. i hit the OpenSea for NFTs. you hit the OpenSea when i dump the body truth is you actually hate crypto. i guess cynics gunna hate only Seed Phrase your familiar with is your girl shouting "Blue finish on my face" nahhh fuck your fat wife, i ain’t poundin ya dime bitch has more gas then every Ethereum transaction since 2009 so don’t try to flex hard please.. one punch to her gut would result in more Ripples than XRP & i ain’t one for being nice to trash forget Red Dead…wanna see a Blackwater Bae? give your wife a bath smash ur head in a parking lot til u’ve been mauled bitch DING DING DING off a couple of Bumpers no Pinball kid go ahead & pull ya pistol i won't call for help i’m reachin for a drum too…those body parts of yours won’t dissolve themselves they call me one of the best ever and a god of sorts well yeah, by n’ large...is something you never do at the condom store plus i sign deals daily and the profit is grand.. next time there’s a Docusign he’ll congratulate you for learning to talk with ur hands perfect execution. no problems. shottys gunna bust if something goes off without a hitch shiiiit I didn't secure ur body to the truck shouldn’t have gotten cocky bro beat me? you’ll Neiderreiter even better than the hockey pro
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"I shit myself
I had to throw my underwear in the dumpster outback Uve won" -kungfugrip Last edited by Blue Bayou; 12-28-2021 at 10:19 PM. |
12-29-2021, 05:46 AM | #4 |
Shrewd as evearthed
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Wolverhampton, England
Posts: 8,270
Battle Record: 28-3
Champed - Gimmick Battle League
- The Winter Topical
- Topical Martyrs
- Lime Green Poetry Association
- Lyric Olympics
- Art of Writing League
- Guerrilla Writing League (2x)
- Black August II
Rep Power: 85899392 |
Muff taste tests his own sperm, Hens faked cancer, you’re obsessed with the drink
Let’s talk off-sets, DOHpe’s the biggest collective of weirdos to ever exist My gun keep it 100 for years, that’s a whole century If urs got a longbottom, mines an ass sagging down further than ur wife’s post-pregnancy Bitch. Don’t think just cuz you got muscles you brave put ‘em away pussy. if I see you in tee, I’ll still call you a cunt to your face all expectations of you fell off hard once the baby was due we know exactly where ur heads at. ur dickriders abandoned you in favour of Zuch You cuddled up beside your heavily pregnant wife for 9 fucking months If doc still had to tell you u were going to be a dad at that point, youre dumb as FUCK bitch you ain’t busting guns, all your moneys taxed fuck your cash. There’s a difference between being a stick-up kid and a stuck up brat I’ll punch this fucking faggot then ghost after funny you mention snapped collars when it’s evident youre looking to bone Fracture ur wife got no casabas, just oreo nipples on a young slut mom mounds so flat i call her Towel Rack. after two pegs ain’t nothing to get hung up on ur nantucket but we’ve never seen that Smith Point, pussy we clap straight so make sure if you gonna start Wauwinet before u end up in a Mass grave
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- Netcees Rebuttal Tourney - Art of Writing League (x 4) - AOWL Season 11 Champion (Undefeated Season) Last edited by sral; 12-29-2021 at 11:50 AM. |
12-29-2021, 04:31 PM | #5 |
Everything's Connected
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: Niagara Falls, Canada
Posts: 999
Battle Record: 19-8
Champed - Guerrilla Writing League(2x)
- GWL Picture challenge(2x)
- Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 10178702 |
That's strange I thought wordplay being top tier was assumed
Was that a rap or an impression of Rock's character in Jungle Cruise? If there's a king's disease then I get you, I can't say this guy isn't special But I've BEEN a perfect ten, and you benign since I met you You're topical reign has never left us, too many useless windshield wipers But it's so-narrow-in-scope I assumed Cupid was a sniper I could do a gas leak rhyme or a mystery about a ghastly crime... If you knew wordplay you'd know I did both at the exact same time Caution's the side I air on, bitch I'll kill you with a chair shot Like that actor's last name that's the exact opposite of hair loss... Connect the dots... I'll wait... This fairy ain't cutthroat Look bro, you can't make headlines when you barely a footnote Why do you get no joy from winning yet have trouble with the losses? Why do people with half the talent get double the responses? It stands to reason, like a verdict, that it hurts you in private This Lars persona looking vulnerable as the person behind it That insights a riot like cop violence; Look at this expired addict Lines redacted yet there's no meaning behind his blackness Hospital's staffless plus the ambulance went to the wrong address I imagined you died after seeing your doc'... John Madden Now he's going ape shit because moral fibre is lacking Hoping we bask in his glory like the Tiger King, fact is... My only competition is line limits... Hospitality just docked here Come to my backyard you'll probably be saddled with a launch error Relax I meant saddled with a lawnchair - You'll fail even at topics bitch Everytime I brush up on your past I get that pale Ian taller gist... That's what you wish, cuz you awkward as shit dog it's obvious When's our rubber match?? I can't recall the last time a condom fit Never known hardships, you're the inner tube that fell in a lake quick You haven't been through most walks of life, I can tell by your gait, kid Gap between us is Earth to a spaceship, when results are determined and placed in... Just know the only way we embrace is with orthodontic work in our faces.
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..Passed the Present and Future.. Last edited by Universe; 12-29-2021 at 05:22 PM. |
01-04-2022, 01:53 AM | #6 |
Badgerdick
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Showdown City
Posts: 2,604
Battle Record: 11-2
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 22685549 |
Sup Canada?
It’s workrate over wordplay in topical matches I could beat you at your own game… but, hockey’s for faggots. You’re not even battling here! You’re just looking for relevance come with a clever diss, not one that only insults our intelligence. I’m the one putting the effort in while you watch from the sides steady taking shots at a guy you went and lost to last time. What was it, five-nothing my favour when we got done with that caper? You doubled my wager and still got left eating the Dust of our Labor. You struggled your way to a three-round final again had a highly debatable 2nd round, in a tourney with no recognisable names. It took 100 lines and some change for you to edge it past him against a faggot who writes in English as his second language. You write lengthy transcripts but we don’t read ‘em or wanna listen we’re not in fear of your comp petition, you’re inferior competition. I’ve been here since the beginning, you only got in at the end, no one offers you respect because the competitions dead. I mean what were you expecting when nobodies even left to have posited a threat? You’re a novelty at best. There’s one thing you do well in, yet none of it is fresh see quantity is negligible when you leave quality unchecked. You lack logical progression, always plot twists at the end, with the same comedy of errors right from one into the next. None of them are memorable so stop with the pretence like your accomplishments have merit when your oppositions spent. You’re firing shots behind a fence here just for being heard if you’re gunning for the Colonel, then sign-up with the reserves. |
01-05-2022, 12:22 PM | #7 |
Everything's Connected
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: Niagara Falls, Canada
Posts: 999
Battle Record: 19-8
Champed - Guerrilla Writing League(2x)
- GWL Picture challenge(2x)
- Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 10178702 |
Alright Colonel, one last time...
Assembly's truly required for these words like a church full of putrid liars What connects us sets us apart... Even YOU know that Unifier... Don't talk plot devices when your drops are still doing nosedives I'm like an Equalizer slaughter scene - I will kill you n' know time Archived pages but can't compete with all the bars I entomb I just assume you shyin' away from it like the dark side of the moon Not enough provisions to see it through... I haven't begun to get into it Too cloak and dagger; It's no wonder you have a gun but never druid Beating me once was dumb luck; Now all he does is just trail I've defeated Diablo, BOOM & Clutbuck, that's 3 to 1 on my scale Bring on Richard Corey and Pent Up, ain't my fault these old folks have bailed In the winter of your careers I'm feeling summery... Cole's notes in braille If your topic was 'grow stale' you'd most likely never get losses I'm locked up aware, so whatever comes out is a fresh concept I said I'm locked Tupperware... You veggin' out and left rotten I'm on edge ready to snap - Do me a solid and put a lid on it I murder topics before you get started, that's why I get the strap It's a wrap; The minute you get wind of it I'm on my second draft Get me my full metal jacket... You're the 'bare witness to the semi' type With a sentry marked in your sights you'd still miss it, Betty White Never seen you avenue line, you grew up in sand my fam paved Sod off ingrate, my yard's like Superman - Always landscaped Barely holding your weight... How can you still deny I'm the best, dog? Showed you the ropes now you zip-lining... guess ya too fly to catch on... Respect is gone but to win it back you have to stay composed Or you'll find yourself at a loss for words... that's just the way it goes Stake imposed in this vampire's chest, that last rhyme you spit was a flex? Guess your fangs must've came out... cuz that was a bit of a stretch You bound for success? Nah man, we just found you in leather You keep an ear to street, indifferent; I hear you're down for whatever... You'll never get off the ground floor; I got penthouse raps dork So this L evaded, if you're the gold standard then I plat forums Yeah you won last, but to students in my Masterclass course... I've beaten him here... http://www.netcees.org/showthread.php?t=142549 here... http://www.netcees.org/showthread.php?t=142850 and even here... http://www.netcees.org/showthread.php?t=144216 Do I have to add more? Oh you ARE the teacher! That's a riot, ya convo-looted this store Not even full time, but I guess he subs-to-toot his own horn I like rape and snuff porn... psych - That's YOUR sad little secret So when I say I'm engorge, that's-our-chasm between us Guess recycling was needed; I'm not concerned with your response son Like Jessie Owens - Those punches will never hold up in the long run.
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..Passed the Present and Future.. |
01-05-2022, 01:01 PM | #8 |
He / Him / His
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 1,676
Battle Record: 20-1
Champed - Summer Classic IX
- Netcees Battle League
- Fight night 15
Rep Power: 12534702 |
@Universe you should team with @kungfugrip and hop in
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01-06-2022, 09:07 AM | #9 | |
Everything's Connected
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: Niagara Falls, Canada
Posts: 999
Battle Record: 19-8
Champed - Guerrilla Writing League(2x)
- GWL Picture challenge(2x)
- Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 10178702 |
Quote:
If this is not agreeable then I can fill in for Adverse if he doesn't show. Peter Quill and I can be The Star-Lords.
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..Passed the Present and Future.. |
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01-11-2022, 04:43 PM | #10 |
Shrewd as evearthed
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Wolverhampton, England
Posts: 8,270
Battle Record: 28-3
Champed - Gimmick Battle League
- The Winter Topical
- Topical Martyrs
- Lime Green Poetry Association
- Lyric Olympics
- Art of Writing League
- Guerrilla Writing League (2x)
- Black August II
Rep Power: 85899392 |
Don’t you ever get bored of writing that same old illogical shit
like the rest of the forum aren’t aware of what an oronym is? Malapropisms are simple as fuck, they don’t establish dope writers they make you a target and I mondegreen like the grassy knoll sniper. I said I’m on the… Nevermind bitch, let’s get back to the basics, the lines trash and you failed in your attempt if you have to explain it. Faggot you ain’t shit. Your styles always been so hit and miss it’s like throwing a shit against a wall 100 times hoping it sticks. You’re over simplistic, no one has interest to ever give credit, at best you’re generic Lars-lite without the technical merit. You bury your head in a story til you forget where your headed no wonder you end up here mentioning me, you’ve no sense of direction. Nobody questions your effort, I’ve no problem with you on that but bet your Christmas Dinner was trash, you take so long trimming the fat. Your names fitting in fact since your concepts really old and everything we see from you today occured fucking YEARS ago. You’re nowhere near as dope, I’ve been a mainstay in tournaments the winter of my career means back to back grey day performances. I’ve reigned straight through all of ‘em with no letting up so your coat better come with its own feather hood. You’ve had low pressure months, time to go get your gloves, I’ll ruin your whole wretched summer with this cold weather front.
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- Netcees Rebuttal Tourney - Art of Writing League (x 4) - AOWL Season 11 Champion (Undefeated Season) |
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