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05-18-2018, 11:56 PM
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 89
Rep Power: 4050152   |
Do 2 Wrongs make a Right?
 Walking home from school with light up sneakers- Rain drizzlin down, wish her shoes had high end speakers- Hands muzzled her sound as he played finder's keepers- Now I can't show my face as wine outlines my finest features- Time's my weakness, outspoken as my mind confines my deepness- He's going on death row. I'm the one who should be finding Jesus?- I can't unwind I'm speechless, I kinda despise this preacher- For even saying a prayer to this fucking mindless creature- Decisions are like mountains to climb & mine are steeper- You can try to pry inside but you know my eyes are ether- Holy water for a soul even tho he's a fire breather- What should I believe since your nothin' but a liars teacher!- My alcoholic remedies step up to swing & hit my liver- I hate my daughters death but do I wish death upon the sinner- Do 2 wrongs make a right? Nothing left to give the winner- I'm so stressed & lose a breath when she doesn't sit for dinner- I have nothing left within' my chest I wish I had a kiss to give her- I feel like she was hunted nothin' but shark bait- Raped and then killed and cut with a sharp blade- As my entire body chills inside of this dark place- But to see him actually die really sparks flames- So should I stay strong or fold like a card game- Keep on drinking even tho my fuckin' heart drains- Way too much thinkin' despite I have a smart brain- I'm constantly sinkin' each and every one of my scars stain- My daughter was deprived so should I live life the fullest- He's gonna die so should I? have half the mind to pull it- A rock & a hard place, I guess I should jus' bite the bullet- |
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05-19-2018, 12:16 AM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 783
Battle Record: 2-1
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 19584278 |
Engrossing read. I read it in my head, but was still able to pick up the rhythmic pace of the flow. Which was near if not completely flawless. Your wording was also pretty good. Just maybe one or two lines that could have been tweaked. However, I think the overall content and lyrics were really strong. There are no shortage of pieces about child homicides and death, here or anywhere else. But your take on the topic was compelling and captivating. I dug the approach. I'm out now eating and drinking with friends so l'lI keep it short. This was dope. Salute.
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Last edited by ACTIVATE SELF; 05-19-2018 at 09:32 PM. |
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05-19-2018, 01:15 AM
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SOBER
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 12,480
Battle Record: 2-5
Champed - AOWL Season 2
Rep Power: 85899407 |
"Engrossing read."
Lmao fuck the entire way off.
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Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder |
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05-19-2018, 09:21 PM
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SOBER
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 12,480
Battle Record: 2-5
Champed - AOWL Season 2
Rep Power: 85899407 |
Sorry @ACTIVATE SELF that was rude.
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Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder |
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05-19-2018, 09:33 PM
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 783
Battle Record: 2-1
Champed - Art of Writing League
Rep Power: 19584278 |
I now feel whole again. Thank you ;)
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05-19-2018, 09:42 PM
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death warmed over
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Downstairs illstreet dam
Posts: 2,564
Battle Record: 6-21
Rep Power: 0   |
Lol that sucked im not even going read this artdeco shit fuck this shit lol
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https://soundcloud.com/user-876573949/ https://soundcloud.com/user-634430314/ |
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05-20-2018, 12:58 AM
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Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 89
Rep Power: 4050152 |
2tripple0 what' the problem?
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Linear Mode
