the new year's Eve

Cimmerian · 12-05-2015, 08:46 AM

Pea coated December, scarves and the sweaters
A kaleidoscope colored crowd packed all together
I’m fettered within—cuffed to a beer and a grin
Paul Revering the revelry here with my friends
Records spin, women turn leaves on the wind—
Weaving with my limbs, never to see them again
Holiday season I guess, while stealing a breath—
There’s a sweat booze cigarette feel to the scent
Ignored the odor, ordered a vodka and soda—
For a long blonde begonia from Minnesota
Sort of laughed and gabbed, talked Malbecs and Cabs
Would you like to dance? She used to . . . tap and jazz
As we slide on the floor smooth ivory chords—
Beg me to dip her, our dance steps paint a picture
Raphael'd for a spell until the moment in time—
Finds us all Auld Lang Syne bodies entwined
Lips twist licorice, her tongue cools as it enters
One hand through my hair, her spare pulls at my Windsor
Must she lust a last one night stand, Colonel Custer?
My palms play catch up, her body cuts the mustard
Cab lights glide through the black city grid
Like firefly nights—those Julys as a kid
But I’m a man with a plan, to Ma’am, the game’s over
Until we semi-sober roll over with our hangovers.

sral · 12-05-2015, 09:48 AM

Dope shit.

Good to see you back at it!

Keep that pen moving!

dead man · 12-05-2015, 11:12 AM

Awesome

Vulgar · 12-08-2015, 09:29 PM

Pretty dope - like a vintage jazz album with hip hop's sense of humor and dash of abandon.

Cimmerian · 12-27-2015, 09:36 AM

Thanks, all.

Tis' the season.

Cimm.

Quarter O · 12-27-2015, 05:23 PM

I feel like I read a sophisticated novel by :novel author here: ..You're diction is proper. Makes me ask if you're from London or something but that's my ignorance for thinking you have to be from London to write proper english.. A few lines were on the cheesy side but most of it was cool. Shit was nice honestly..Dont wanna make it seem like I wasnt feelin it..Would be nice to see how shit sounds in audio.. keep rockin tho ..

Pinot Grij · 12-28-2015, 09:44 AM

Quote:

Would you like to dance? She used to . . . tap and jazz
As we slide on the floor smooth ivory chords—

Your style smashes every note of predictability to pieces, which is what makes this so fun to read. I never know what's coming next - and that is a rare talent in a form we've all been around for many years. Vulgar summed up my thoughts exactly. This was a pleasure to read.

Bodey · 01-02-2016, 03:19 AM

Mm that last line though

12-05-2015, 08:46 AM	#1
Cimmerian Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2013 Posts: 142 Rep Power: 2933499	the new year's Eve Pea coated December, scarves and the sweaters A kaleidoscope colored crowd packed all together I’m fettered within—cuffed to a beer and a grin Paul Revering the revelry here with my friends Records spin, women turn leaves on the wind— Weaving with my limbs, never to see them again Holiday season I guess, while stealing a breath— There’s a sweat booze cigarette feel to the scent Ignored the odor, ordered a vodka and soda— For a long blonde begonia from Minnesota Sort of laughed and gabbed, talked Malbecs and Cabs Would you like to dance? She used to . . . tap and jazz As we slide on the floor smooth ivory chords— Beg me to dip her, our dance steps paint a picture Raphael'd for a spell until the moment in time— Finds us all Auld Lang Syne bodies entwined Lips twist licorice, her tongue cools as it enters One hand through my hair, her spare pulls at my Windsor Must she lust a last one night stand, Colonel Custer? My palms play catch up, her body cuts the mustard Cab lights glide through the black city grid Like firefly nights—those Julys as a kid But I’m a man with a plan, to Ma’am, the game’s over Until we semi-sober roll over with our hangovers. Last edited by Cimmerian; 12-30-2015 at 04:02 PM.

12-05-2015, 09:48 AM	#2
sral LARSLARSLARSLARSLARS Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: CRUMPETVILLE Posts: 8,608 Battle Record: 28-3 Champed - Gimmick Battle League - The Winter Topical - Topical Martyrs - Lime Green Poetry Association - Lyric Olympics - Art of Writing League - Guerrilla Writing League (2x) - Black August II Rep Power: 85899396	Dope shit. Good to see you back at it! Keep that pen moving! __________________ - Netcees Rebuttal Tourney - Art of Writing League (x 4) - AOWL Season 11 Champion (Undefeated Season)

12-05-2015, 11:12 AM	#3
dead man living Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 3,485 Battle Record: 33-18 Accomplishments - Hall of Fame Champed - AOWL Season 1 - Art of Writing League - AOWL Season 4 - Write Week V - GWL Season 1 Rep Power: 77606679	Awesome __________________ Zack Wicks for president

12-27-2015, 05:23 PM	#6
Quarter O Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2015 Posts: 109 Rep Power: 0	I feel like I read a sophisticated novel by :novel author here: ..You're diction is proper. Makes me ask if you're from London or something but that's my ignorance for thinking you have to be from London to write proper english.. A few lines were on the cheesy side but most of it was cool. Shit was nice honestly..Dont wanna make it seem like I wasnt feelin it..Would be nice to see how shit sounds in audio.. keep rockin tho .. Last edited by Quarter O; 12-27-2015 at 05:32 PM.

12-08-2015, 09:29 PM	#4
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Pretty dope - like a vintage jazz album with hip hop's sense of humor and dash of abandon.

12-27-2015, 09:36 AM	#5
Cimmerian Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2013 Posts: 142 Rep Power: 2933499	Thanks, all. Tis' the season. Cimm.