There isn't a whole lot to say because it was just a "Crazy" topic. But I thought you did quite a good job with the rhyming and got your tone across to the reader. We were instantly dragged into the psychotic mind of the protagonist and got a strong image of what he was like.
I feel that you could definitely be a little bit more original, or if you're going to write something like this, at least have a storyline or plot to it, because that way a reader can get dragged in and feel like there is a "point" to the piece.
Nice work man. Keep writing.
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