Adonis : Great take on the topic the hiphop music era scheme has been done before but you finessed it and did just enough in my ears it would sound great recorded this is like subjective voting cause i would consider your written more of a statement then a story driven concept but its still a clear and concise take on the topic but lacked the engagement of being that i feel like frank brought with his verse.
Frank: When a good writer gets in the zone its noticeable and this week you definitely ''zoned'' the character engagement
the plot the lyricism and most importantly the correct technique and punctuation
in writing the English language something I can work on.. this drove the story home I enjoy imagery and being pulled into the verse you did that..
vote = Frank <subjective> both written's are good just felt frank was more precise on all levels. and wrote more of a story while adonis wrote a song/statement
|